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Sophia shook her head, tears already filling her eyes.
“Sorry. God, I don’t know what’s going on with me at the moment. I’m all over the place,” she began to sob.
“Hey, it’s okay. Whatever you’re feeling is allowed. You’re bound to be up and down. It wouldn’t be normal if you weren’t.”
“Sometimes, I just think it might be better for everyone if I wasn’t here.”
“Sophia, baby; you shouldn’t say things like that. Nobody feels that way.”
“I do.”
“Well, you’re wrong. Don’t you get it? I’m nothing without you.”
She looked up at him through her tears.
“Nothing,” he reiterated.
“You’re wrong, Brodie. You’re everything. If it wasn’t for you, I-
He cut her off. “That’s exactly how I feel. We need each other in equal amounts. I love you so much that I’m not even sure where I end and you begin because believe me, I feel all of it. All the confusion and hurt but all of the love, too. We’re in this together and nothing you can say will ever change that.”
Sophia paused to absorb the enormity of his feelings towards her. Their connection was undeniable but hearing the words from his lips put all of her doubts into perspective.
“I just wish the treatment could make me better.”
“It can buy you time, that’s all we need. Just a bit more time.”
She looked up at him and smiled through her streaming tears.
“We’ve had all the time we need, Brodie. A thousand more years couldn’t show me that you loved me any more than I already know you do. I’ve made peace with this and I know it’s difficult, but trust me, you will, too.”
He shook his head this time. Tears slid down his cheeks but they weren’t tears of sadness. His face was creased with burning anger.
“The only thing that will bring me peace is you getting better.”
“It might never happen. As much as we both wish and hope, we have to face reality that this is probably it for me.”
“Whatever happens, I’m not letting you go, Sophia. Get it out of that pretty little head of yours. You're surviving this. WE are surviving this.”
He was angrier than ever, Pent-up feelings exploded out of him like cannon balls firing into the abyss. It scared Sophia to see him lose his cool. He was her rock. The glue that held them both together whenever she was falling apart, which was more often than she cared to admit.
He slipped his trainers on and for a minute Sophia thought he might throw her over his shoulder and carry her to Truro Hospital himself. Instead, he turned to leave.
“Where are you going?”
“To find a solution.”
“Please, Brodie. Sit down and let’s talk about this.”
“I’m done talking. That’s all anyone ever does. The doctor’s talk. Your family talks. Everyone’s always got so much to say and no one is doing anything. I’ll be back with something or someone who can actually help.”
“What does that even mean? You can’t just leave me here. When will you be home?” Sophia’s questions trailed after him as he ran down the stairs, grabbed a baseball cap off the kitchen worktop, and left her there.
CHAPTER 28
The drive out of Lani Bay wasn’t long enough for Brodie’s heart to find its natural rhythm again. It raced as fast as his car did as he headed toward the city and then down to the coast.
He knew nothing about oil rigs, except that one existed off the southwest shore. It was a fair drive from Lani Bay, but based on what Bert had said; it seemed like a good place to start.
