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I reach for Butter, giving her a pat down her nose and then along her neck. I glance back at the man holding the reins. “I’d like you to hand the reins to Claire, please.”
His brow furrows as he purses his lips.
“It’s okay. I know what I’m doing.” I attach the lead rope I’d grabbed to Butter’s bridle. He nods and works the reins up so Claire can hold them.
Claire moves her hand and makes the sign language move for ‘thank you.’ I smile. “You’re welcome,” I sign back. It’s been a hot minute since I’ve used it. Everyone who works here has to know it or learn it because we have a vast range of clients, and we like to accommodate as many people as possible. “Don’t pull too tight, or Butter will stop. Hold her gently, okay?” I hope she understands, but she nods again, and then I click my tongue, and Butter moves at the sound, slowly walking.
Claire gives a little squeal of delight, and the smile on her face could light up any dark room.
I say, “Woo,” and Butter reacts again by stopping. I look up at Claire. “Wait one minute.” I hold up my finger and then turn to the three workers. “Sometimes the clients want to feel in charge. Butter works on sounds as well as being led. I click my tongue to get him walking and say “woo” to get him to stop. You guys are doing amazing.”
They all give their thanks. I turn and walk away, unable to wipe the grin from my face. Sebastian stands at the fence, smiling, his eyes bright and only on me, but someone farther back catches my eye as well—Dad. He gives a small half-smile before turning away and going about his business. A surge of happiness pumps through me at finally settling in and helping others. It’s what I always wanted to do, and training the horses is my therapy.
“That was impressive.” Sebastian nods in Butter and Claire’s direction.
Claire is happily riding Butter while being led around. It brings a tear to my eyes. “Butter is a good horse.” As I climb back over the fence, Sebastian grabs my hips and assists me down—not that I need it, but it’s nice to have the good kind of attention on me. “Thanks. So, will you let me teach Rylee on Butter? Look at Claire’s face… imagine it’s Rylee’s. You would be dad of the year.”
He chuckles. “How did you know what to do then?” He points out to Claire and Butter.
I shrug. “Odette,” I state simply. “She was very much the same. These support workers are doing a great job, but sometimes they forget to look at the bigger picture and think about the person they’re working with. Everyone’s different. Odette would get so upset, in tears and screaming because she didn’t want to be led again… she wanted to hold the reins, and that little gesture gave them a sense of control since they can’t control other parts of their bodies, minds, and everyday lives. Being on a horse can calm them. Some are happy to be led around, no problem. Claire simply wanted to be in charge, and the way I trained these horses, I trained them to respond to sounds. Like a click of the tongue is go, and ‘woo’ is stop. All horses should have it, but again, I’ve been gone for three years, so I’m not sure who the newer horses were trained by.”
Without a word, Sebastian wraps me up in his arms, holding me tightly for a moment. “Thank you for showing me a different side of the world. I’ve been kept in the dark about most disabilities and special needs kids. They really are special in every kind of way. I’d love to find a way for some kids to come to a Formula One race and come in the paddock to meet some racers and fellow engineers and mechanics. Just so many people. I want to see that smile you put on Claire’s face on a heap of other kids. Heck, I’d be happy to start a foundation or something to help those who may need it and to give them something special.” He says all this into my neck, and my arms tighten around him. He lifts me off the ground and spins in a circle.
“That would be an amazing opportunity for these kids, but not only kids… adults as well. Maybe it’s something to look into for a time in the future.”
He releases me but runs his hands down my arms and links our fingers together. My chest tightens with anticipation. His touch is powerful—I’ve had one little bit, and I keep going back for more. “I’ll see. I hope you realize I’ll be looking into this.”
“That’s good. I have every faith you can achieve anything you put your mind to,” I say.
He moves nearer, his heated stare on my mouth. The world around us fizzles away as he gets closer and closer. My pounding heart sounds in my ears. Sebastian leans in, and not for the first time today, his mouth is on mine.
SHE TASTES LIKE SWEET CANDYand is completely addictive. Her mouth molds to mine, and I want to kiss her daily. It’s been so long since I had an intimate connection with anyone, and my body comes alive with desire and the want to claim her.
Our breaths mingle, and within a moment, she pulls back. “Maybe we should slow down a little. Don’t get me wrong, you’re amazing. It’s just I worry we don’t know each other well enough.” Her hands rest on my chest, and mine still on her hips.
“If that’s what you want, I’m okay with that. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable at all.” I want her to feel as though she can come to me for anything, and I’d happily be her savior. This pull between us is getting tighter. Why?
Delilah takes a step back, out of my grip. Her mouth is pink and well-kissed, her breaths not settled yet. “Let’s just see what happens. You possibly won’t be here for much longer, and you have a busy life somewhere else. You’ll also be traveling for your work again soon.”
I scoff. “Maybe, if my manager can find me a seat to race in. My team has handed my seat to someone else because I’d taken time to grieve my wife and care for my girls. Hopefully, next year I’ll be back at it.”
She smiles, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. “I know. You’re a big superstar racer. You’ve got to get back to it, and that’s totally okay.”
Why do I feel as though she’s pulling back from me?
“Do you still want to spend time with me while I’m here?”
She shrugs, and her eyes blink furiously. “I’d like to. It’s fun spending time with you and having someone understand what I’m going through. Not many people do. My family understands loss since we lost our mom, but I have to tell them about Eli tonight. Who knows how Dad will react, or any of them, for that matter?”
Reaching out, I take her hand. “If you need me, you know where I am.”
“Thanks,” she says and squeezes my hand. “Now, I think I’m going to have a shower before I get chafed in places I don’t want.” She laughs.
I shake my head. “Same. What are you doing after that?”
“Well, I’ve got to go down and check on the horses and work with them for a few more hours. I’ll stop in and check on Olive as well.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t step foot in there because the moment you do, they’ll want you and won’t let you leave. Trust me, I did that the first few times when I took the girls to vacation care back home, and I learned some big lessons those days. Maybe just message your sister to see how things are going,” I offer.
