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“I wish it was enough.”
“Sometimes we need a bigger push to get out of our own way.”
“I just wish I knew what that push was.” I sighed and let melancholy blanket me. This sucked. When I’d left him in Dallas, I’d had my brother to worry about. Then Diamond UU.
Now all I could do was wallow in the misery. I took a drink of my water, biting the straw between my teeth.
“I wasn’t talking about him,” she said tentatively.
“Hmm?” I set the glass down.
“The push. I wasn’t necessarily talking about Archer.”
“But—”
She held up a hand, closing her eyes like shejust couldn’twith me anymore. I would take it personally, but the woman could silence a class full of fifth graders. I didn’t stand a chance. “Laney, you’ve become one of my favorite people, but that stubbornness and fire I used to dread crossing my path are blocking yours.”
“What do you mean? I can’t let Diamond UU fail. What would Kane do? And Ma—”
“Have you asked them?” She arched a brow. She damn well knew I hadn’t. Tapping a finger between us, she leaned forward as if to further protect our quiet conversation. “It’s important to Kane to run his own life, and you’re making decisions for him.”
“I’m not.”
That brow ticked up again. “You are. Same with your ma. Liam leases out the pastures. Kane could do the same if he wanted income from the ranch without doing anything.”
“What if Ma runs it into the ground?”
“What if she’s hanging on, going out in the heat and the blizzards because you are? Your dad still works. Your mom and Kane could downsize so the Diamond UU is more manageable for her. Or she might want to retire altogether so she can go on all those fishing trips your papa takes. But she and Kane are not going to downsize if the ranch has to support a ranch manager, and they’re going to make sure they have a place for you. Your ma’s rough around the edges, but she cares about you.”
I had thought Ma made me ranch manager as a consolation prize. But what if she and Kane had finally talked? What if they’d had to figure out a way to support my ass because I refused to fucking leave?
“Oh, God.” I’d spent so long wondering why I wasn’t enough that I settled for where I was needed instead. But I wasn’t needed anymore. Kane had plans. Ma had plans. But they wanted me to be happy, so they were trying to be flexible.
Kennedy held up her hand again like she was putting my panic on pause. “I’m also not saying Archer doesn’t need a wake-up call. But you two didn’t get anywhere when you both were spinning your wheels. You were like this.” She made fists and put her knuckles together. She didn’t have to explain it. Archer and I had been like two bumper-to-bumper trucks stuck in the mud, revving to get out, but I was in his way, and he was in mine.
“What do I do?”
Holden picked that moment to walk by. He swung into the booth next to Kennedy. “You ladies need a problem solver?” He frowned at my water, and his eyes narrowed on me. I could picture what he saw. Pale face, wan expression, bloodshot eyes. “Am I interrupting something?”
“Archer left, and I don’t know what to do.” Holden wasn’t the last person I’d thought I would open up to, but he certainly was far down as an option. Yet, he was here. I’d rather have Liam’s insight, but he’d stayed with the kids so Kennedy could straighten my shit out.
“You want to stay married to him?” he asked like his solution would depend on my answer. He also asked like he was taking my dilemma seriously. I never would’ve imagined this.
I nodded.
“Your brother has Diamond UU?”
Damn, news traveled fast in Coal Haven. I nodded again.
“Then buy yourself a ticket and spend three weeks in Dallas.”
I chewed the inside of my cheek. It wasn’t that easy. “Archer tried that already, and it didn’t work.”
“Then do it naked.”
I coughed out a laugh. “Holden.”
Kennedy chuckled and elbowed him.
