AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I rushed up the steps, and the door opened before I reached it. My mom’s eyes were wide.
She hugged her robe around herself. “Oh, Emery. You didn’t have to come home. Riley and I would’ve figured it out.” Guilt flashed through Mom’s eyes. “I think she had too much sugar.”
Big surprise. Mom was used to being the grandma that flung treats around like she was in a parade, but now that we were around more, she’d have to leave her candy stashed. Part of my reason for moving was to live in a town with a slower pace and to have her help. She’d moved to Coal Haven for work and a more affordable cost of living a few years after my dad died.
I stepped around Mom and took my coat off. “How’s she feeling?”
“Better, but I thought maybe you’d have some Pedialyte or something.”
By kid three I had given up trying to stock special drinks, but Mom had always sworn by the stuff. Just another log to toss on the crackling fire under my guilt.
No, I wasn’t going to work myself up over this. The kids had had their grandma to themselves for a few hours, something that hadn’t happened much when we were a busy family an hour away.
“How much did she throw up?” I toed out of my shoes and padded down the hallway and up the stairs to Riley’s room.
“Just the once. And then again right after. I guess I’d count them as once, but in the moment—” Mom made an exasperated sound. “Well, it seemed like more. So much for a tiny little body.”
I entered the room. My one-and-a-half-year-old was sitting up in her crib. “Hey, nugget,” I said softly.
She reached for me. I felt her forehead. No fever. Relieved it was likely nothing but a gut ache from Nana’s goodies, I picked her up and went to the glider rocker in the corner. Riley rested her head on my shoulder, her dark curls tickling my nose.
Mom hung in the doorway. The hallway light was on. “Do you need me to get anything?”
“No, I think the worst has passed. I’ll get her settled back down. Why don’t you get some rest?” I had planned to be up late, not her. But tonight had taken all different turns. “Is the couch okay, or did you want to take my bed?”
“Oh, no. This old lady can still sleep on a couch.” She adjusted the edges of her purple robe. “You didn’t have to rush home.”
“I know,” I said on an exhale. Maybe I had latched on to the excuse. The longer I stayed with Holden, the more I would’ve kidded myself about what was really going on. I couldn’t risk thinking there was anything real about what happened. Mutual pleasure. Nothing more. “I wasn’t really doing anything. Don’t worry.”
“Oh, I’ll always worry.” She closed the door so only a crack of light shone through.
I rocked Riley until her breathing evened out. She’d expect to be rocked asleep tomorrow night too. Henry had been gone a lot with his long hours, but the upheaval had upset her. She was clingier and prone to tantrums.
I’d like to be clingier and prone to tantrums, but that was never my relationship with Henry. Looking back, it was clear he’d wanted four kids, to be the successful surgeon who could support a big family, just not the actual work and logistics of raising them. And it had been the same for me as his wife. He didn’t have time to comfort, and there was always his job.
So rocking Riley to sleep would comfort me as much as her. I laid her down in her crib, softly shut the door, and turned.
A bleary-eyed eleven-year-old stared at me. I jumped and pressed my hand over my mouth before I shouted and woke Riley. “Avery. You scared the crap out of me.”
Avery blinked and screwed her face up. “I thought you were getting lit tonight, Mom.”
Oh, I’d gotten something, but my preteen daughter was the last I’d talk to about that. “Do you know what getting lit means?”
She shrugged.
I wanted to keep it that way for a while. I ruffled her hair. “I had one drink and came home.”
“Mm.” She pressed into me for a bear hug, then stepped back just as quickly. She shuffled to her room across the hall.
I brushed a strand of hair out of my eyes. It fell back in. I gave up and took the band out as I followed her.
“It’s not fair that I have to share a room,” she mumbled as she crawled into the twin bed with her powder-blue bedspread.
I went to the other twin bed on the opposite end of the room. There were three feet between the beds and enough leftover room for a dresser. The closet was so full, I’d probably lose a child when the door was opened.
“How was Afton tonight?” I ran my fingers lightly over my six-year-old daughter’s dark hair. All the kids had hair darker than my light-brown tresses.
“She threw a fit when Nana didn’t cut her grilled cheese the right way.”
