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She wasn’t two steps into the library before she noticed that it already held someone slumped in a chair with a glass in hand and a dog on his lap. “Sir Phineas, I didn’t expect to see anyone in here.”
He tipped the dog off and bowed. “Miss Barrow, you are welcome to join me, as long as you don’t mind the companionship of an overfed pug. You don’t seem like you would have a fit of the vapors from an over-early glass of brandy.”
She managed a smile. “If we are to be drinking companions, I would far rather you called me Letty.” She nodded at the pug, who was staring at her with big eyes. He was tan with a black muzzle and rather a lot of wrinkles, and somehow he was rather adorable.
He poured a glass, passing it to her and then nudging it with his own. “To your health, Letty. Please do call me Phin. To what do I owe the pleasure of your accompanying me today in seeking a little Dutch courage?”
“I seek not courage, but rather something somewhat closer to oblivion.” The brandy was smooth and strong. It was perfect.
“I too have such days,” Phin said. “Today, for example.”
“What happened?” She took another sip and settled into a deep leather chair. They were both outsiders here so she decided that social niceties could go hang, and she toed off her shoes and tucked her legs under her. The pug put his paw on the chair and wagged his tail, and when that didn’t garner him the attention he wanted, hegave a little whine and pushed his nose against her knee. Charmed, she scooped him onto her lap.
“I suppose I’m dwelling on my purpose these days. Since I moved in here, I feel as if I am not much more than an appendage instead of an autonomous man of my own accord. I love Hawthorne, but I wonder if it was wise to move in. Especially as it has upset the duchess so much.” He threw his drink back and poured another. “What about you?”
She hesitated, then took a deep drink to fortify herself. “My son paid me a visit. Frankly, he behaved so poorly that I am ashamed to admit that I taught him his manners. He had the gall to try to extort money from mentioning my supposedly lucrative affair with the duchess.”
Phin laughed, then shook his head. “It isn’t funny, but your son sounds priggish and rather foolish. Doesn’t he know you would have heard much the same or worse, from people far less sympathetic to you? Haven’t you had washer women spit at you and men spill things on you in the taverns? God knows I have.”
She raised her glass to him. “I certainly have. I would give most anything to have things be easier and to never experience such things again.”
“We are in perfect accord, my dear Letty. I used to throw the occasional party at my townhouse and invite people like us for some comfortable socializing. We can’t have any parties here with Her Grace in residence, of course, but I sorely miss them. Is this getting older, do you suppose? Growing more responsible and respectable by the year?” He stared down his glass, one eye screwed shut as he contemplated it, then drank.
“I’m forty-two and sometimes I still wish to fling all my cares to the wind and run away from my responsibilities.”
It was horrible to remember the hard times, yet it felt good to talk with someone who had experienced some of the same things as herself. Letty felt some of the tension ease from her body as she scratched behind the dog’s ears, which seemed to meet with approval as he gave a little huff and settled his head down on her thigh.
“I can’t begin to imagine having the responsibility of a dukedom,” Phin said. “I worry enough about managing my ownhousehold, which is far and away much smaller than this mansion. Of course, I’ve made things complicated in that regard, but I can’t help myself,” he said.
“How are your household affairs complicated?” she asked.
He leaned in. “Sadly, I seem to be the softest touch of any man I know, and thus I’ve employed more chambermaids with a history of theft than any one man ought. My heart bleeds for them when I hear of them being fired from other households for being generous with their favors or being with child, so I keep hiring them, knowing that most will turn their hand to thieve me the same way they’ve done others.”
She stared. “If you know they’ll do it, why do you keep them in your employ?”
“One shudders to think where they will end up next with no employment. I console myself with the knowledge that I have the opportunity to indulge in new cutlery and candlesticks at least once a season, so I am always in fashion.” He wiggled his brows.
She was touched. “You’re a generous man, Phin.”
He gave her a sidelong glance. “Speaking of fashion, youaregoing to finish the designs for Hawthorne’s rooms at some point, right? I have a vested interest in that ducal bed, you know.”
“You aren’t terribly inventive if you need to wait for the bed.”
“Oh, I haven’t waited.” He smiled wickedly. “It’s just that one’s knees also are getting older, and his bed is sure to be wondrously soft.”
“I will take care to select the very softest mattress out of consideration for your poor knees,” she said, patting the one nearer to her and taking another drink.
“It’s the duke I was speaking of,” Phin confided.
She laughed. “I promise I will finish his room next. Anne’s chambers will be done tomorrow, and I admit I am looking forward to her seeing it.”
“Anne, is it? What are your intentions toward the lovely duchess?”
Letty paused. Her feelings for Anne were complicated, and she didn’t know how to categorize them. She loved spending time withher and learning more about her. She had a deep-seated need to give her every comfort and pleasure she could imagine, so she could see the smile on her face in return.
Butintentions? That implied something rather more serious. That was the kind of question an overbearing father asked of a suitor.
She decided for the moment she didn’t have to worry about it. After witnessing Robert’s awful behavior today, something felt different inside. She had spent her life focused on raising her son, but he was a man now, free to make choices and mistakes without her hovering over him. For the first time, she felt free to focus on herself.
