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Fencing my heart from further damage, I stood up straight. I walked around the table and passed Grayson. I reached for Jade’s hand wanting to pull off my ring, but Grayson pulled me by the waist.
“Lils, stop. I’m sorry that you thought the ring was promised to you, but it’s Jade’s now. You can’t have it.”
“It’s mine!” I thrashed in his arms
In my peripheral, I saw Nathaniel taking his son to the other room away from the commotion.
“Lily, you need to calm do—” Marcus tried to reason but I shot him a death glare.
“Give me my ring.” I thrashed in my brother's arms. As I struggled against my brother, kicking and yelling, my shoe flew off my foot and landed on the side of Jade’s head.
“Ah,” she hissed.
Immediately, Grayson dropped me and went to the aid of his fiancée. When he assessed the damage and found that everything was okay, he snapped his neck in my direction.
“What the hell is your problem Lily? Why do you always cause disaster wherever the fuck you go. Why couldn’t you just be happy for me instead of making all of this about you? This is why I hadn’t even wanted you here today!”
The room went eerily silent. You could hear a pin drop.
“Grayson…” Marcus started, but he was cut off.
“Lily, all you ever do is bring problems on this family. If it ain’t you stealing cash from mom, it’s messing around with a drug dealer and, if it’s not that, it’s you pulling shit like this. I’m tired of it. I’m tired of always having to defend you to mom all the time. No offense, Lily, but I think she’s right. You make it so difficult to love you sometimes.”
“Grayson, that’s enough,” Ethan spoke up.
“No, it’s not. This has been going on for the past five years. You barely got your GED, Lillian, and instead of trying to make something of yourself, you decide to go play hooker at the Grove.”
“Grayson, that’s enough,” Ethan gritted through his teeth.
I felt the first tear slip from my eyes. I knew coming here was a mistake. I looked around the room and saw everyone looking at me with different varying emotions behind their eyes.
Maddie looked like she wanted to come to where I was standing, but I shook my head at her. I then turned to my brother.Everything that I had been holding back and suppressing for the past few years came bubbling to the surface.
“You were meant to be my protector. The person I could always run to when the monsters came out to play. You were so focused on fighting off the outside monsters, you couldn’t see the inside monsters that were lurking in our home. For years, you defended her actions. When she sent me to correctional camp three summers in a row because she said I was acting out.”
I looked up at the ceiling blinking away some of the tears that had filled my eyes.
“I wasn’t acting out. I was grieving the loss of my dad. I needed you two, but you weren’t there. She was at your every game, every competition, and dance. She forgot about my sophomore prom because you needed to go and get your cast removed. You both left me, and I was forced to raise myself and be there for myself. I was a troublemaker, Grayson. I was trying to get your attention.”
I turned my gaze to my mother.
“If I am so hard to love, mother, then fine. I quit being your daughter. You don’t have to love me, and you don’t have to be there for me.” I scowled. “It’s not like you were there anyway. So goodbye. This is the last you will be seeing of me in your life. The same goes for Grayson. Consider me gone out of your life.”
I walked to where my shoe had fallen and put it on my foot. I looked to Jade with an apologetic look on my face.
“I am so sorry dinner had to be like this. I hope you enjoy the rest of whatever is left of this night.”
Then I took off. I didn’t hear footsteps behind me, so I knew that no one was following me. It wasn’t so much that I wanted someone to follow me, but I wanted one person to hold me so this pain would subside.
I walked out the front door and into the cold fall air. I didn’t want to go back into the house and have to face everyone, so I braved the cold.
I started down the sidewalk, going nowhere in particular. I just knew that where I wanted to go was better than my mother’s house.
After a lengthy walk and bruised feet, I found myself at my father’s tombstone. I stared down at the grave. I hadn’t been here in what felt like years which was probably correct seeing as I hated coming here.
“Hey Dad,” I whispered. “I miss you.”
