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Maybe I’ll feel better about talking then, although I’m supposed to be leaving.
“You can. I’m inferring that to be an affirmative.” She drops her voice lower. “As in you’re seeing him. Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me and if you thought I was going to judge you, I’m not. I’m not wired that way.”
“Thank you,” I answer, although I’m not confirming or denying anything—technically.
I look back to the empty trail Chad left behind. Even though he’s gone and a group of students now fills my view, I still see him and still hear his words.
He called me his.
What would it be like to truly be his?
I’ve never felt anything more tempting.
I suppose the only way to know what it would feel like to be his is to stay in New York and abandon my plans to go back to L.A.
Love might tempt me to do it.
Chapter18
Chad
Maksim cheers as I lean over the pool table, take my shot, and win our round.
I laugh when Ilya curses us in Russian, calling us cunts and everything under the sun. He’s five G’s down. It’s time to quit, but the fucker would never do that.
“You fucking assholes.” He slams a fist into my arm, which doesn’t hurt.
That’s how we mess around. If this were a real fight, the end of his jaw would have connected with my face. Then he’d be on the floor picking up his teeth.
We’re at the Crow, the bar we usually hang out at when we’re not partying at each other’s houses. We’ve been playing pool for two hours already and it doesn’t look like we’re going to stop any time soon. Any kind of game we play involves betting and I always win.
I’m here because it’s Billie’s mother’s birthday, so she went out for a family dinner.
If she didn’t have plans, I would be with her. Right now, I’m counting down the time until tomorrow when I see her.
I shouldn’t count down anything because time is still my dearest enemy, but I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t. I count down because I can’t wait to see Billie and I stop myself from doing so because the days are fast approaching for her to leave me.
“One more game,” Maksim calls out as another song starts playing.
The volume is low up here on the game floor, but when they change the song, it gets louder for a few seconds.
I nod and he high-fives me. Ilya and Lev, however, already look defeated, but they’re in.
I laugh at them and take a swig of beer, stepping back so Maksim can have his turn.
The soft flutter of fingers runs over my back when I set my beer bottle down on the table next to me.
When I turn and find Jenna standing behind me with a saucy smile on her face, my insides twist. Looks like she didn’t get the message last time.
She hugs me. A clear indication that my parting words at Maksim’s party fell on deaf ears.
“What do you want, Jenna?” I can’t hide my displeasure at seeing her.
“You.” The laughter that falls from her lips reminds me of burnt honey. Not sugary or sweet but brazen and sour. “Are you ready to come back to me yet? I’m always ready for you.”
“I told you I don’t want you. But I’ll say it again. I don’t want you, Jenna.”
She smiles like she’s privy to some fucked-up joke I don’t know the details of.
