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“Jude...music is your life.”
“Wrong,” he said gruffly. “You’remy life.”
He might think that. He might believe it down to his marrow. I might want to believe it to the depths of my soul. But I knew, sure as the sun would rise, if he didn’t give this chance his all, he’d regret it forever. He’d always wonder “what if,” and so would I. I was twenty years old; I wasn’t capable of being someone else’s world, not when I wasn’t quite sure what I wantedmyworld to look like yet.
“I love you, Jude. I love you so very much. But you have to take me out of the equation. You and I will make this work.”
“I’m never taking you out of the equation,” he said firmly.
“Okay, then my part of the equation is telling you to go to New York. That I’ll come up on weekends. We’ll get phones that can text. We’ll have phone sex. We’ll do everything we can to make it work, and between now and when you leave, we’ll spend every spare second together.”
He was quiet for a long time, breathing heavily and holding me so tight,Icould barely breathe. I held him as best as I could, stroking his hair, pressing my skin against his. I hated this for him. If I were stronger, or slightly less in love, I’d give him up entirely so all of this would be easier. So he could walk away without leaving anything behind.
But that wasn’t an option…for either of us.
“I don’t know how I’m going to look Sev in the face again,” he murmured.
“Forget him,” I said. “He can’t hurt me, and he doesn’t know anything about what goes on between us. I’m sure Ben and Tino set him straight.”
Jude shuddered, pulling back a little to meet my eyes. “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, Stripes.” His pretty hazel eyes were a swirl of colors and emotions. “Before you walked into that elevator, I was so uninspired. Not just with music, but with life. You brought it all back.”
“Jude…” I was suddenly shaky too. “We’re going to be okay. We’ve got love and music and honestly. As long as we keep that, we’ll make it.”
I said it, because it sounded true. But I was twenty years old, what did I know?
