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Fuck, I really did say that. But it’s no fucking excuse. This ismyson we’re talking about.
As I argue with Izzie, I can’t help but imagine all the things I would have done differently had I known.
“Lucy fucking died from having this child. It hurt too much to try to explain it. And after so long, after seeing how big you’d become as an athlete, I wasn’t going to track you down and just spill to you one day that Liam is yours. It’s just not a possibility I would have entertained,” she says.
“God, I knew he looked just like me, too. I thought about it, and, for just a split second, I thought he could even be my son. The instant bond I had with this kid is insane. It doesn’t happen. I shouldn’t have been so naive. And I shouldn’t have even begun to trust you.”
“Trust me? How can you even say that with a straight face? You abandoned this family before it was even whole. I’ve made it my goal in life to make sure that Liam feels nothing short of loved and wanted. And I’ll be damned if this is going to ruin it for him!” she shouts.
She rushes inside the house and stomps up the stairs.
I go inside and decide to sit alone in my room, trying to process all of this. As I lay on my California king-sized bed, I hear furious movement, followed by a slamming door.
Just hours ago, I enjoyed what I had going on with them, whatever it was. But now, it’s more complicated than that, and I don’t even know what to think or where to begin.
Rather than chasing after them, I’m going to sit back, just for now. I can’t fuck this kid up by not addressing this tactfully. I just can’t.
God, she fucking knew I was an orphan.
Shit, she was one, too; I guess that’s why she’s so guarded with Liam. He thinks she’s his mom, and she doesn’t want him to know otherwise. I guess I can’t blame her; knowing that kind of loss is heart wrenching and literally the worst hurdle to jump as a kid.
As much as I fucking hate her right now, I understand where she was coming from, too.
