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Chapter Twenty-Nine
Jethro couldn’t say that Sable had been on her best behavior so far today, but he also knew it could have been a lot worse so he tried to walk the line of stern with defined and firm expectations but supportive too. Didn’t seem like Sable had gotten much in the way of encouragement or praise ever.
And while he clearly wasn’t afraid to use corporal punishment when she’d been naughty, he would never raise his voice or shame her, try to make her feel small or stupid or like she wasn’t worth being kind to.
“It’s time for lunch, baby.”
Sable looked up at him from where she was nestled on the couch with her laptop and a dog on either side of her. Usually Marigold and Rhodie wouldn’t miss a chance for scraps in the kitchen but they’d become very attached to Sable very quickly. Jethro couldn’t blame them; he’d fallen just as hard just as fast.
“I just need another hour. There’s this contract that the lawyers messed up and if I don’t—”
“If you don’t fix it today, nothing is going to happen. You can deal with it tomorrow. You’ve already worked more than enough today and you’re done.”
She scowled back at him. “Why do you get to decide when I’ve had enough?”
Jethro gathered his patience in the face of her pouting. “I get to decide because you’re not very good at taking care of yourself and apparently no one else in your life cares enough about you to set limits. I love that you burn so bright, baby, I really do, but I don’t want you to burn out. If you keep going like this, that’s what’s going to happen. You need to eat, you need to rest, and you need to have some fun. Since you’ve worked all morning those are the things we’re going to do this afternoon.”
Sable looked at him over her laptop and her fingers twitched.
“Please save whatever you’re working on and come to the table. You have two minutes.”
“But—”
“No buts, little miss.”
She screwed up her face and he could feel the change in the air—Sable was about to lose it. But maybe he could defuse her tantrum before it happened. He loved to spank her and punish her but also knew she didn’t like feeling out of control and that’s what her fits were.
Jethro sat on the ottoman that was still planted in front of her and took her laptop and put it on the floor next to him, careful not to close it so she wouldn’t lose any work she hadn’t saved yet. Sable looked like she was about to scream.
“I think you’re having some really big feelings right now. Do you want to tell me what they are?”
She snapped her mouth closed and looked at him like he had three heads.
“It’s totally okay to have big feelings. Everyone does. It’s what we do with them that matters. So instead of pitching a fit and getting punished for it, maybe you want to try talking to me?”
He brushed the backs of his knuckles above her knee. “What are you so afraid of, baby?”
Jethro could tell he’d hit the nail on the head because her chin started to tremble and then a tear squeezed out the corner of her eye and rolled down her cheek. And then she climbed onto him, nearly knocking him off the ottoman.
That seemed dangerous so he stood without putting her down and settled them both in her vacated seat on the couch, Sable still with her limbs wrapped around him and sobbing into his shoulder. Poor little girl.
“I don’t like getting in trouble.”
“I know you don’t. You’re such a good girl and good girls don’t like feeling badly behaved.”
She shook her head against him and he rubbed her back.
“And I…I just want to do a good job. And I want…I want my parents to be proud of me. I want them to love me. And if I don’t do my work, if I fail, then they won’t, not ever.”
Jethro’s heart broke for her.
“Oh, my sweet girl,” he said, giving her a big squeeze. “I know what it’s like to not want to disappoint the people you love. I was terrified when my parents retired and left me in charge of the business. They’d worked so hard and it was their legacy and I was so worried that I’d screw it up somehow. That the ideas I had weren’t any good and I’d drive the place into the ground after they’d left me a thriving business.”
“You were?”
She sounded like she didn’t believe him. While it was sweet that she thought he was infallible, that wasn’t what he was trying to say. He was as human as anyone else.
“Yeah, I was. And I worked harder those first two years I took over than I ever have in my life. But you know what I never worried about?”
“What?” she asked into his shoulder, her voice small and muffled.
“That my family wouldn’t love me anymore if I failed. I know they’d be disappointed. But I also knew if I asked for help they’d give it to me. And if in the end it didn’t work out, it’s not like they were going to disown me or tell me I was a terrible person. I would’ve, you know, found a new job and moved on.”
Sable sat back then, that disbelieving look on her face again. “Really?”
He shrugged. “Yeah, really. Love shouldn’t depend on what you can do for someone. You shouldn’t feel like you need to pay for it. The people who love you and care for you…their response to you being hurt and tired shouldn’t be solely that it’s an inconvenience. They should want you to feel better. I want to help you feel better.”
She sniffed and then buried her face in his shoulder again, beginning to cry in earnest. They weren’t pretty, delicate tears but big, heaving sobs. His poor sweet girl.
He held and rocked her for a long time, crooning soothing things into her ear and he wasn’t surprised at all when she fell asleep on him. And fuck if he was going to move and wake her up. Nap before lunch then, whatever she needed.
