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Chapter Thirty-Two
Acouple weeks later, Gideon awoke in the middle of the night. It was quiet. Too quiet?
He’d become used to Plum sleeping next to him every night over the past few weeks and she wasn’t a quiet sleeper. Which was fine—he could sleep through damn near anything and a little snuffling or mumbling wouldn’t trouble him. Sometimes she was quiet, but mostly not.
It looked as though there was a body under the heap of blankets on the other side of the bed but given how dark it was, he couldn’t quite tell so he reached out gingerly, not wanting to wake her if she was there and sleeping peacefully.
But when his hand made contact with the comforter, it sank into the down because there was no body underneath it to hold it up. Though he’d been only half-awake until then, he sat bolt-upright.
It could be fine. Plum could be using the bathroom. She could’ve gotten up to get a drink from the kitchen. Maybe she’d had trouble sleeping and gone downstairs to read or watch TV so she wouldn’t wake him with her tossing and turning.
She was still having a really hard time and sometimes her grief manifested as insomnia. Though if that were the case, he wished she would’ve woken him and perhaps he would have been able to soothe her back to sleep. Or fucked her into oblivion. Either would do.
He’d been very gentle with her since the fire and he’d begun to wonder if that had been a mistake. Not that he would ever want to hurt her—certainly not in a bad way—but maybe he should’ve been more strict, played as often as she was up for it, fucked harder. Maybe he could’ve kept her from being quite so mired in heartbreak.
Gideon climbed out of his bed, tugged sweats and a tee on and checked first in the guest room, but it was dark and empty. Same with the bathroom.
Downstairs was no different. No lights on, no sign of his beloved. Because he’d come to realize over the past few weeks that he’d been right all along: he loved Plum. His obsession with her wasn’t fleeting or shallow. No, it was deep and would swallow him whole if he allowed it to. He wouldn’t because that wouldn’t be healthy for either of them. But my, could he see the appeal.
It was cold downstairs as well—which, being March was to be expected. Except it felt even chillier than the temperature would indicate. Almost as if Plum had taken the warmth with her.
She wasn’t what he would call sunny—could someone swear that much and be considered sunny?—but she did bring a great deal of brightness and color to his life.
Gideon checked his phone to make sure she hadn’t texted him but he wasn’t surprised when there was nothing there. He wouldn’t bother calling her because she no doubt had her phone on silent. Too bad for her that he had a very good idea of where she’d gone.
* * *
It wasn’t a surprise when she heard the crunch of footsteps behind her, but Plum wished she’d gotten a little more time alone before Gideon had come to find her. She’d been feeling more out of sorts instead of feeling better for the past few days and she was trying not to take it out on him, but it was hard. Everything was hard and she was so, so mad all the time. And miserable. Sometimes a girl just wanted to wallow in front of the burned out shell of her former home and livelihood for a few hours in the freezing cold during the middle of the night. Was that really so much to ask?
So far sitting alone in the snow and freezing her tits off hadn’t helped anything but at least she hadn’t been inflicting her gloom and doom on Gideon. Now he was giving her no choice and that just made her angrier.
“Plum, darling. It’s freezing out here. You’re going to catch your death.”
“That’s not a thing,” she retorted.
“Perhaps not, but you’re still not dressed properly. You’re shivering.”
It was true. She was really cold, but she didn’t want to admit it. “Whatever. I’m fine. If you’re cold you should go inside.”
“I intend to, but I’m taking you with me. And in the meantime…”
She heard the rustle of fabric and then Gideon was draping his big coat over her shoulders. It was warm from his body heat and it smelled like him and it was such a swoony gesture she wanted to cry.
Instead she looked up at him. “If you’re cold, giving me your coat isn’t going to help anything.”
“Sure isn’t,” he agreed. “Now let’s get you back to the rectory and we can talk about why you’re sitting out here in the middle of the night in the freezing cold.”
“I don’t have to do what you say,” she snapped, feeling the tears prick at the back of her eyes and her sinuses burn. “You’re not in charge of me. I can stay out here as long as I want. We’re not doing a scene right now so if you think you can threaten to spank me, you can get fucked.”
Gideon looked at her as though he was taking her measure, like he was trying to decide on his next move.Howdoesone solve a problem like Plum?Finally, he spoke. Slowly. Pointedly. “I don’t know about that. This doesn’t seem like a healthy adult choice to me. This seems like someone feeling frustrated and out of control so they’re pushing boundaries in the hopes of being reined in. Might that be true?”
Plum had a choice to make, and they both knew it. If she wanted to be treated like an adult, she could stand and let Gideon guide her back to the rectory, help her into bed and perhaps cuddle her while she tried to go back to sleep. Or he could hold her while she told him about her fears and her frustrations and how the weight of the stress was killing her. He would listen. And if she wanted, offer advice.
Or she could spout off, pitch a fit, and force his hand. Make him discipline her because her feelings were too big and unruly to be managed by something as pedestrian and mild as talking or snuggling.
She didn’t want to talk, she wanted to scream. She didn’t want to be cuddled, she wanted to fight. She wanted to slam into him, hard, and she needed for him not to crumble.
Which is what made her say, “You can eat a bag of dicks and I hope you and your condescending attitude choke on them.”
