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“Hmmm.” He leans back and rubs his face. “It’s not weird? Living with your mother’s husband?”
My mouth goes dry hearing him call Dominic that. I close my eyes and let them open after a moment. “It’s not.”
He looks me over and for a second I wonder if he could see the truth written all over my face. I wonder if he can sense the discomfort over this conversation. “I think you need some space to grow and flourish.”
I resist the urge to snort and call bullshit.Where was this interest in me growing and flourishing years ago?“And I can’t do that in the dorm I’ve already signed up for?”
“Kids your age would kill for their own apartment,” he retorts and I’m growing restless with this back and forth. My foot begins to bounce anxiously and I feel my heart begin to race. My hands find my lap and I dig my nails into my palms to try and calm the anxiety snaking down my spine.
“I’m sure they would and I think it’s great you want to help, but I just can’t help but think there are strings attached to this. I am getting this feeling like living in your apartment building and letting you pay for it…gives you control over my life and I don’t want that.” I know my words are harsh, especially if there aren’t ulterior motives, but I am sure there is something I’m missing. I’m even surer that his intentions aren’t totally innocent.
I can see a look of anger flash over his features. “Stassi, I’m trying to help and you’re fighting me.”
“You’re not trying to help; you’re trying to control me,” I reply instantly.
His brows furrow and he lowers his head to look at me from over the tops of his glasses. “By giving you an apartment?”The condescension drips from his voice and I so badly want to comment on it, but I’d just rather end this conversation altogether.
“One you own,” I add.I feel like we’re going in circles at this point. Can you just let it the fuck go?
“So, you’re saying no.”
“I’m saying I already have my living arrangements in place. I really appreciate the offer, but I don’t need that.”
He shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair as fiddles with his cufflinks. “I can see you’re just as difficult as your mother.”
Fuck. You.I bite my tongue to prevent myself from blurting those words out. “You’d know if you were around,” I snap.
“Are we ever going to get past that?”
“I don’t know, Micah. I’ve known you existed for about two months. I’m sorry that you coming to my graduation and bringing me flowers doesn’t erase eighteen years of your absence. You’re asking for me to just welcome you with open arms. Why, because maybe you’re not a total deadbeat? Because my mother asked you to stay away? Why didn’t you fight for me? For a relationship with me? Because you didn’t care enough. I was a burden you were happy you didn’t have to deal with—”
“That’s not true, Stassia,” he interrupts and I hold my hand up.
“It is true. You could have looked for me when you supposedlygot out of the life. You said my mom asked you to stay away; why didn’t you fight her on that? Why didn’t you demand to meet me? To see me? I wanted to know you. I asked about you all the time.” Tears spring to my eyes but I swallow them down because the last thing I want to do is get myself worked up over this. He doesn’t respond, he just looks away from me and shakes his head.
“When I heard your mother died, I wanted to make sure you were okay. I know that I haven’t been there for you in the past, but I was worried about you. I’ve been worried about you your whole life.I admit that I could have done everything differently, but I can’t change the past. I’m trying to do better for the future but it seems you’re not even giving me a chance to make it right.”
“I am! I’m here, aren’t I? But you’re going about things in the wrong way. If you want a relationship with me now, this is not the way to go about it.” I point at the table. “I’ve told you this, I don’t need a dad.”
“Oh, because you have one, right? Dominic?” His voice is accusatory and aggressive and I notice his face starts to get red.
“My God, what is it with you and him?”The exasperation in my tone is evident, but I can’t help it. I was officially over whatever his issue is with Dominic. Even if he wasn’t quickly becoming the most important person in my life, Micah didn’t have any right to an opinion on who I choose to keep in my life.
He lets out a sigh and grits his teeth before running his tongue over them. “Stassia…” He shakes his head. “You think you know everything, don’t you?”
“Excuse me?”
“You’ve got it all figured out. No one has ever been eighteen and made mistakes. No one has ever gotten themselves into something so deep they can’t see their way out.”
Wait, what the fuck?
I furrow my brow. “I am so lost. What are you talking about?” I realize my voice is getting louder and I take a look around to make sure we aren’t attracting an audience.
“Fuck it.” He growls under his breath and my eyes widen at his aggression towards me. He stands up and I am shocked that he’s actually leaving.
“You’releaving? Really?”
“Stassia…if I stay here much longer, I’ll say something I’ll regret and I do not want to do that.” He narrows his eyes at me. “If you change your mind, my door is open.”
