Page 37 of Always Been You


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I’m sitting in the backseat scrolling through TikTok as Monica drives my mom and me around doing some last minute Christmas shopping. Even though I’m probably going to have to go back again because it’s impossible to buy a gift for the boyfriend no one is supposed to know about. I couldn’t tell them it was for a boyfriend without an inquisition and I couldn’t buy an intimate or remotely romantic gift and say it’s for James. How would that look?

So, I’ve bought James two sweaters, both of which I know he’ll like and some lingerie for myself that’s mostly for him. I smile to myself at the reaction I got when I showed him and more importantly the topless picture. I do know that I’m being risky, texting him when Monica could easily grab my phone or happen to just see that I’m texting him. I should probably consider at least changing his name.

I pull up his contact and the first thing I notice is our picture. It’s a picture of us when we he took me to the infamous 230 5th which is a rooftop bar and also has the best view of the Empire State Building. I remember we were getting ready to take a picture when my favorite Beyoncé song started playing and I immediately cheered and began dancing. James started laughing and the girl snapped the picture. We ended up getting one where we were posing and smiling for the camera, but something about this candid picture always makes me smile. I know the picture is saved in my phone but part of me doesn’t want to remove it from his contact photo.

Well, if you’re going to be sending him nudes and sexting him, while you’re home, it’s probably for the best. Change it back when you guys are back in New York and can keep your familial relationship more of a secret. I remove the picture and then erase his name, wondering what I should call him. I opt to use his middle name, Michael, for now. It’s common and I’m not about to make up some fake nickname for him.

“So, Gab, I have to ask. Did you lose your v-card this semester?” Monica asks and my eyes fly to the front of the car where both she and my mother are seated. Really Mon?

A gasp from my mother stops me from answering, thankfully. “Monica!” I can tell that she’s shaking her head before she turns around and looks at me. “Baby, you don’t have to answer that.” She turns back to the front but then turns back around just as quickly. “Unless you want to.” She lowers her sunglasses and raises her eyebrows a few times. “Is there a boy catching my girl’s attention? Are you being safe? I mean…STDs, sweetheart, and don’t get me wrong, I would love any little baby you brought home but maybe not—”

“Mom! Not…” I shake my head. “Not doing that.” I hope I can sell this well enough.

“Oh! I thought maybe Monica was hinting at something or she knew something I didn’t and you were trying to break the news to me.” She glares at Monica.

“No, can’t a girl just be curious about her favorite sister?” Monica looks at me through the rearview mirror. “Sissy,” she says using the nickname she used to call me when we were younger. “You know you can tell us anything. We won’t tell Dad and J.”

Just the mention of him has my insides melting. Fuck. I look back at my phone and particularly his message about him wanting my nipples in his mouth and all of the obscene things he said he wanted to do to my wet pussy I refused to send him a picture of. I bite my bottom lip and try my best not to squirm in my seat.

“There’s no one. I mean there are attractive guys, of course, but no one I’m willing to give that part of me to yet.” I nod, satisfied with my answer even as Monica’s eyes narrow.

“Then what’s the harm with going out with Brandon? He’s cute and sweet and we’ve known him for years. He’s not some sketchtastic frat fuck that—”

“Language, Monica Danielle,” My mother interjects with a pinch to her arm.

“Ow. Jeez, Mom, I’m twenty-eight,” she says as she rubs her arm.

“You can be one hundred and twenty-eight, watch your mouth.”

“Can we focus? Don’t you think Brandon and Gab would be cute together?” Monica tucks a hair behind her ear and fiddles with her nose ring.

“Oh yes.” My mom spins around and nods at me. “We can have them all over for dinner? Your father and I go out to dinner with his parents all the time and you two may have come up once or twice.” She taps her fingertips together in rapid succession. “I could absolutely set something up. Brandon’s mom, Amelia, would love that.”

“Okay but I wouldn’t love it. Mom, Monica can we just…not worry about my love life, sex life, and everything in between? Besides Monica, what about you? Hooking up with any doctors in on call rooms?”

“Ugh you watch too much Grey’s Anatomy.”

“And you said it literally happens like that.” I point at her, recalling all the gossip she shared with me because I didn’t know anyone she was talking about. She glares at me and rolls her eyes.

“Fine, yes it happens. It does not happen to me. I’m a lowly intern.” Her shoulders deflate and even from my vantage point I can tell that disappoints her.

I unbuckle my seatbelt and lean forward. “The lowly interns get all the D.”

“Okay, closing my ears for this conversation,” my mother says covering her ears and I giggle, happy to get the heat off of me.

It’s nearing almost five pm when we finally make it home and I’m happy to see James’ car still in the driveaway. The smell of pizza and the sounds of a basketball game hit me as soon as I walk in, and I smile knowing exactly where to find my man. I head into the living room to see James and my Dad watching a game. “Mom wants you,” I look at Dad, “to carry the bags in.”

He immediately pretends like he’s fallen asleep. “He’s younger than me,” my dad says pointing at James with his eyes still closed. James shoots him a look and rolls his eyes before following me out of the room probably a little too closely.

“Hi beautiful,” I hear whispered behind me and I spin around and shoot him a wink.

“Hi,” I say as he follows me to the door. I look out the front window and see Monica and my mom grabbing a few bags and I know Dad can’t see anything. So, against all better judgment, I reach up and grab him by the back of the neck and press my lips to his, sliding my tongue through his lips and touching his tongue lightly. I pull back after no more than a second, careful not to make the sound of a kiss as we pull apart.

His eyes open as I return to my flat feet and I’m out the door before he can entice me into kissing him again. “Tease,” I hear murmured behind me and I giggle as I skip the car.

“Is there anything left at the mall?” he teases as he pulls the rest of the bags out of the back of Mom’s Range Rover.

“Most of this is for you, jackass,” Monica says as she walks by with a playful eyeroll as she bumps against his shoulder.

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