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“No?” She cocks her head to the side in question. “I can see the wheels turning. I can tell you want to throw yourself in the middle of this, but as your best friend I’m telling you not to.”
“I just can’t believe he hasn’t told me any of it.”
“I’m sure he has his reasons. Maybe he doesn’t want to drag up bad memories for you.”
“No, we’ve talked about Blake. I mean, not in any great detail, but he’s brought him up. I don’t think that’s it.”
“I’m not talking about Blake,” she says hesitantly, quickly adding, “Or maybe he’s afraid we will think less of him.”
“I would never think less of him. How could I? It’s not his fault.” I choose to focus on this statement and not the one that involves me or my past. I just can’t go there right now.
“I agree. But you know better than anyone what that feels like. Besides, we don’t know the specifics of the relationship or how bad the abuse was. Maybe it’s not what we’re thinking. We can’t judge based on information we don’t have.”
“I guess.”
“Look, I know this hits close to home for you, but you’ve gotta let it go. If Ant wants to talk to you about it, he will. In the meantime, he’s still the same guy.”
“Yeah, I know.” I shrug it off, trying not to lead on to just how hurt I am that he didn’t tell me about this himself, or that it even happened for that matter.
I feel oddly protective over Ant, and not the way I would be over just any other friend. There’s something more there. Something that I have spent the last few weeks trying to ignore.
I’m not ready to let myself admit what that means just yet.
