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“I know you will.” She smiles down at me, her face so much like my mother’s it causes my eyes to well. “I’m so proud of you, Elara. You had a choice. To either let life beat you down or refuse to let it take you under. You’ve been through so much and for you to be able to turn it into something like you have–it’s incredible. I just wish your mother could be here to see the amazing woman she raised.”
“Me too.” I force a smile.
“God, I’m sorry. Here I am getting all emotional on you when you need to be focused for your meeting.” She makes a noise in the back of her throat and swipes at her eyes just as a tear falls from each one. “Knock ‘em dead, sweetie.”
“I will,” I promise, firing the engine to life.
“I love you.”
“Love you.” I offer one last wave before backing out of the driveway.
****
“You did it?” Carol screams into the phone so loudly I have to pull the device away from my ear.
“I did it,” I confirm, still not able to believe it myself.
Today I signed over the rights toThe Road to Youand while it was impossible to let it go, it also felt so liberating at the same time. Walking out of that office, knowing what I had accomplished, there’s no way to describe that feeling. And yet it was surrounded by an air of sadness because the one person I wanted so desperately to share it with wasn’t there.
I thought about calling him, several times in fact, but I made him a promise that day in the hospital and I had every intention of keeping it. He was right after all. We did need time. I was just too focused on being with him to see it in that moment. And while being away from him hasn’t been easy, I know now it’s what I needed.
“Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god!” I can picture Carol jumping up and down. “Did you call your dad?”
“Yep. I just got off the phone with him. He and Lynette are already planning on coming to town so we can all go out and celebrate.”
“This is so incredible. I can’t believe you did it. You actually did it, Elara. Do you feel different?”
“I feel like I’m in a bit of a dream state,” I admit.
“I can imagine. I feel like I’m dreaming.” Carol laughs and I can’t help but smile at how excited she is for me.
She’s been by my side through a lot. I’m so grateful I have her to share this with.
“And if your father thinks I’m waiting on him to take you out celebrating he’s nuts,” she quickly adds.
“We can just keep that to ourselves.” I chuckle before quickly adding, “Listen, I’m at the airport so I’m going to let you go. I’ll see you at the house later?”
“Sounds good, honey. Be safe and shoot me a text when you land.”
“Will do.”
We quickly say our goodbyes and I end the call before pushing my way inside the airport. For reasons I don’t fully understand, I find myself pausing to look up at the flight schedule, freezing the instant I see a flight to Chicago leaving in less than two hours.
One minute I’m standing there staring at a screen flashing with cities and times, the next I’m at the counter purchasing a one way ticket to Chicago.
I don’t think I fully processed what the hell it is I’m doing until I’m boarding the plane just over an hour later when the panic starts setting in.
Kane told me I had to come to him. He told me I had to be ready. He made me promise.
I am ready.
I think I’ve been ready for weeks but have been too scared to take the leap. Afraid that maybe he’s changed his mind and doesn’t want me anymore.
I push those doubts aside and quickly take my seat, knowing there is only one way to find out. I just have to jump and pray to God he’ll be waiting to catch me when I reach the bottom.
****
I text Carol and my dad on the way to Kane’s apartment and then silence my phone and slip it into my bag. I can’t answer all the questions I’m sure they’ll have, because honestly, I don’t have the brain power right now.
