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Chapter Twenty-seven
Abel
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“So, you’re officiallydating?” Claire smiles, knocking her shoulder into mine as we make our way down the sidewalk. Claire’s new little yapper dog is bouncing happily next to her.
“I guess we are,” I admit, feeling hopeful in a way I never imagined I would again.
I used to think there was no way I could love someone like that again. That there was no one on this earth that would ever compare to Finley.
But the more time I spend with Peyton, the more I realize that it doesn’t have to be so cut and dry. It’s not about loving them the same because they aren’t the same. And it’s not about Peyton replacing Finley, because no one will ever have the power to do that. It’s about her claiming a part of my heart that I didn’t even know existed anymore.
Over the last few weeks, she has slowly opened my eyes to all the things I was too lost in my grief to see. Possibility. Hope. A real chance to be happy again. These are all things I wrote off after Finley died.
“You seem really happy,” Claire continues.
“I am,” I admit. “For the first time in a long time.”
“I’m glad. After everything, you deserve it.”
“So where is this dog park we’re going to again?” I ask when we stop and wait to cross the street.
“Just around the corner.” She gestures ahead of us.
“I still can’t believe you got a fucking dog.” I shake my head, looking down at the little white ball of fur. “I gotta admit though, she’s pretty cute.”
“She is, isn’t she.” She smiles down at her. “Nick found her for me.”
“Nick did, huh?” I question. “You two still hanging out I take it.”
“Hanging out. Let’s go with that.” She gives me a look that says I don’t want to know more.
“If he does anything to hurt you, you better tell me.”
“Why? So you can go all brother on me and beat him up.”
“That’s exactly why.”
“You’re sweet, but I can take care of myself.” She takes off walking and I quickly catch up to her.
“I know you can. You’re one of the strongest people I know.”
“Thank you for saying that.” She lays her head against my bicep for a brief moment.
“Well I mean it. You really are.”
“I like to think Fin passed me some of her strength when she died. Otherwise I don’t think I would have survived losing her.”
“But you did.”
“And so did you,” she counters, reaching over to squeeze my hand.
“Yeah, I guess I did. I didn’t come out unscathed, but somehow by the grace of god I’m still in one piece. I think Finley had something to do with it.”
“Oh you know she did. Sometimes I think she’s standing behind an invisible curtain, pulling all the strings.”
“I feel that way too sometimes. Like something random will happen and I’ll think to myself,okay, Fin, I’m listening.”
