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“I wouldn’t hold your breath.”
“Oh stop it. You’re a total babe. I bet there’s tons of guys that would love to go with you.”
None that I want to go with.
“Okay, I gotta get to class. Talk at lunch?”
“Yep. Sounds good.”
I take a deep breath in through my nose and slowly blow it past my lips.
I’m happy for them.
I’m happy for them.
I’m happy for them.
I repeat the mantra in my head as if that will make it true. Well, Iamhappy for them. I just wish their happiness wasn’t preventing me from finding my own.
I know I have to get over this obsession I have with Alec. Especially now that he’s officially my best friend’s boyfriend. But for some reason I can’t seem to let go of this crazy idea thatweshould be together.
I think it’s time to accept that’s never going to happen.
——
“Hope.” I look up fromthe book I’m reading to find Teller Wallace hovering next to me, his hands wrapped around the straps of his book bag slung over his shoulders.
“Hey Teller.” I lay the book face down on my desk, silently cursing him for the interruption. I’ve already read the book, but given that today is our review test, I thought it might be a good idea to do a little refresher.
“Hey.” He shifts his weight from one foot to the other, looking uncharacteristically uncomfortable.
Teller isn’t a jock per se, but he hangs out with all the jocks. He’s not the most popular guy in school, but he runs with the popular crowd so I guess that makes him popular too. Not that any of this explains why he’s talking to me right now. Given that I can count how many times we’ve spoken to each other on one hand, despite the fact that we’ve been in the same school since Kindergarten.
“Hey,” I repeat when several seconds pass and he’s still standing there, silent.
“So, um...” He reaches around and scratches the back of his head. “I was wondering if you maybe wanted to go with me to Spring Formal,” he blurts, unable to hold my gaze.
Funny. I never took Teller as the shy type. He always seems so confident. Then again, I’ve never seen him interact with a girl so how do I really know.
“Huh?” I stupidly respond, having not expected this to be the direction our conversation was going to take.
“Spring Formal,” he repeats, tugging on his book bag straps.
“Oh, well I...” I avert my gaze as I try to figure out what the hell to say. On one hand, Teller is cute and it feels really nice to be asked. But on the other hand, something is holding me back from saying yes. Maybe it’s because I’m still trying to come to terms with what I learned earlier today...
My eyes go to where Alec is sitting at the desk next to me. He has his face turned down toward his notebook and I can tell he’s trying to mind his own business, but he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t listening. Hell, at this point I’m pretty sure the entire class is listening.
“I appreciate you asking me, Teller.” I turn my attention back to the boy in front of me. He really is quite handsome with his sandy blonde hair and bright blue eyes. If the circumstances were different I would probably say yes. But there’s only one person I want to go to the dance with, and since I know I can’t go with him, I won’t be going with anyone. Or at all for that matter. “But I’m actually not going to the dance.”
“Oh.” He rocks back on his heels. “Lucy said you were.” Suddenly everything becomes clear...Freaking Lulu.“She thought since I didn’t have a date and you didn’t have a date that maybe we could go together.” He seems to realize how that sounds once it’s out and immediately starts to backtrack. “Not that that’s why I’m asking. I’ve actually wanted to ask you for a few weeks.”
“Well, as I said, I’m not going,” I repeat, trying to let him down as gently as possible, even though he probably doesn’t want to go with me anyway.
This is all Lulu. I should have smelled the scent of her game from a mile away. With her and Alec official, and going to the dance together, she’s trying to set me up with someone so that I’ll go with them.
I’ve been friends with her long enough to know there’s very few lines she won’t cross to get her way.
“You sure? I think we could have a really good time together.”
