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But that doesn’t mean I want her to hate me either. It would be really nice to walk into a room and not feel her shooting daggers at my head.
Doing my best to ignore Lucy’s clear avoidance of me, I push my way through the back door.
“Henry is ready if you want to load me up.” I slide up next to her at the counter where she’s mixing some sort of pasta salad in a large glass dish.I can’t believe she’s going to be leaving me.
“Okay.” She continues to stir. “The meat is on a tray in the fridge. Would you mind grabbing it?”
“Not at all.” I turn, pulling open the refrigerator. I spot the meat on the middle shelf and pull it out before knocking the door closed with my hip. “Anything else I can do?”How will I ever get used to the idea of not having her here?
“Not at the moment.” She throws me a smile over her shoulder and I swear it hits me like a sledgehammer to the chest.
How am I going to last an entire summer without seeing that smile? Let alone who knows how long after that?
The thought sobers what little of my good mood is left.
——
Ihang with some ofmy buddies from the basketball team for most of the party. After joining the team Senior year, I became pretty close with some of my teammates. I’ve played the sport every year since I was five, with the exception of Junior year due to moving right around the start of the season.
I considered trying to get a basketball scholarship for school, but they’re super competitive and I wasn’t sure I wanted to continue playing after high school.
Once the food was ready and Hope came outside, Lucy was pretty much glued to her side. Where not unusual, I couldn’t help but feel like she was doing it just to spite me. Regardless, I kept my distance out of respect for Hope. She already had her parents to worry about. I didn’t need her worrying about me and Lucy too.
And even though I couldn’t spend the party with who I wanted to, it was still really enjoyable. We ate, shot the shit, played a little cornhole, and got a fire going as the sun began to set.
It wasn’t your typicalparty, per se. More like a large cookout. Then again, Hope isn’t really the partying type. I can count with one finger how many times I’ve seen her drink alcohol. Because it only happened once. She ended up getting sick and puking on Lucy’s shoes. Where Lucy didn’t find it amusing, I sure as shit thought it was hilarious.
To my knowledge, that is the one and only time Hope Russell had drank at a party or otherwise. Just another example of how different Hope is than other girls. She doesn’t fall into peer pressure or buy into fads and trends. She is unapologetically herself and I love that about her. I wish more people were like her. Hell, I wishIwas more like her.
“There you are.” I look to my left as Hope slides up next to me by the fire. A few of our friends surround the flames as they roast marshmallows.
“Here I am.” I grin down at her.
“I feel like I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“I was trying to keep my distance for Lucy’s sake.” I shrug, shifting my weight from one foot to the other.
“Well, she just left so you can breathe now,” she teases, leaning into my side. I wrap an arm around her shoulder and tug her in closer. “Can I ask you something?” she tacks on after a long moment of silence between us.
“Anything.”
“Why did you break up with Lulu? I know what you told her, but what’s the real reason? Did you really feel like you were going in different directions or was that a cop out?”
“I thought you didn’t want to get in the middle of it.”
“I don’t. I just... I don’t know.” She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth. “I guess I’m curious why a guy would break up with someone like Lulu. She’s smart, funny, drop dead gorgeous. I could go on and on.”
“Lucy is a great girl. Yes, she’s all the things you listed and more. But there was something missing. And I don’t know how to describe it. It wasn’t anything she did. It was just a feeling I had.” I turn my eyes back out to the fire, not able to hold her gaze any longer. “Besides, she’s moving to Texas in a couple of months. It’s doubtful things would have worked out even if my heart was in it.”
Everything I said is true, but it’s not the full truth. If I’m being honest with myself, Hope played a part in my decision to end things with Lucy. But I’ll never tell her as much.
“I guess I get that. Sometimes you have to trust your gut. If it’s telling you something is off, it’s probably because it is.”
“Yeah.”
“So, are you excited about California? You leave in the morning, right?”Thank god she stopped asking about Lucy.
“My flight leaves at ten in the morning. I’m excited but I’m also a little nervous.”
