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“No, I’m being honest. And while we’re on the topic of honesty, I would like to point out that lying by omission is still lying. No matter how much you tell yourself you’re protecting Lucy, the truth still remains that wedidsleep together. Nothing will change that.”
“You think I don’t know that? You think I’m not sick to my stomach with guilt every time I talk to her? I hate what we did. I hate that I’m lying to her. But mostly, I hate that I want to do it again.”
I’m almost certain I’ve heard her wrong.Did she just say she wants to do it again?
“Don’t you get it? That’s why I blew you off. I knew the only way to end it was to cut all ties. Because if I saw you, or even talked to you, I knew I’d never have the strength to let you go. And I have to let you go, Alec. No matter how badly I want you and me together, we can’t.” She drops her hands from my neck and steps back, despite my best effort to keep her close. “I love you, Alec. I’vealwaysloved you. I probably always will. But I won’t hurt Lulu any more than I already have. I can’t be that friend. I won’t be. If you care about me at all, you’ll respect that and not try to contact me again.” With that, she spins around and leaves me standing alone on the dance floor. If possible, I’m even more confused now than I was before.
I want to go after her. I want to hold her close until there is no space between us. Until everything is resolved and she realizes that cutting me out of her life isn’t the answer. But knowing I can’t do that without making a scene, I spin on my heel and take off toward the bar. After everything Hope just said, I’m going to need a strong drink. Or maybe ten.
——
“You doing okay there, buddy?” Henry slides up next to me as I polish off my sixth whiskey in less than an hour. Or is it my seventh? Hell, it might be my eighth. I’m pretty sure I stopped counting after four and now I’m guessing.
I sway slightly on my stool.
“Nope,” I tell him, sliding the empty glass across the bar before asking for another.
“I take it things didn’t go so well with my sister?”
“That’s putting it mildly.” I grunt, nodding to the bartender who sets a fresh drink in front of me.
“You might want to slow down.” Henry nods toward the drink.
“Nah.” I lift the glass to my lips and dump half the contents back in one gulp. “What I need to do is talk to Lucy.”
“Now might not be the best time.”
“No, I think now is the perfect time.” I kill the remainder of my drink, slamming the glass back down on the bar.
I push to my feet, the rush of the alcohol running through my veins fueling my movements.
“Alec, let’s talk about this.” He’s trying to reason with me but I’m too inebriated to hear any of it. I know what I need to do and no one is going to stop me.
Leaving Henry standing at the bar, I set off across the room in search of Lucy. I find her sitting at the table with Hope and a couple of others who haven’t joined the festivities on the dance floor.
Are they doing the fucking chicken dance?
I shake off the thought and hone in on Lucy who smiles when she sees me.
“We need to talk.” I tell her, ignoring the burn of Hope’s gaze on the side of my face.
“Okay.” Lucy pushes to her feet and crosses around the table toward me.
“Not here,” I tell her, snagging her arm. I tug her toward the door that leads into the hallway, veering around several people on my way.
When the door snaps closed behind us, the silence settles over us like a heavy blanket.
“Are you still in love with me?” I ask point blank, pushing past the slur in my voice.
“Yes,” she answers without hesitation.
“Why?”
“Why?” She seems confused by my question.
“Yeah.Why?”
“I don’t know. I guess I never stopped.”
