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Why the fuck would I want Barlow to feel anything?
I can’t stand to be in the same room with the woman.
Then why did you kiss her, you fucking dumbass?My inner voice has a go at me. Why not, everyone else is taking dick shots tonight. Might as well take a couple at myself.
I kissed her because... Because... Because...
Awe fuck, who am I kidding? I kissed her because I wanted to.
It wasn’t planned.
I didn’t orchestrate this whole “keep your secret” plot in order to have a reason to kiss her. Hell, I wasn’t even planning on cashing that in. I would never tell Brennon. It’s not my place. Of course, I wasn’t going to tell her that. But then there she was, so close I could smell the sweetness of her skin and see the light freckles that pepper her nose – the ones you can only see when you stand really close to her – and I just fucking blurted it out. I saw an opportunity to satisfy an itch and I took it.
So really, I guess this is all my fucking fault.
The shit she said tonight – I deserved it all and then some.
Maybe that’s why I got so mad, because deep down I know she’s right... about everything.
“Atlas.”
I jump at the sound of her soft voice, which is followed by a light knock on the door.
I stand completely motionless, my heart jack hammering inside my chest. When did she get home? How did I not hear her come in the front door? How long has she been here?
“Can I come in?” Another knock.
Don’t fucking open the door. Don’t open the door. Do not open the door.I repeat over and over again in my head.
“I know you’re in there.” She knocks again.
I remain silent, my fingers twitching around the bottle in my hand.
“Listen.” She lets out an audible sigh. “I’m sorry about what I said earlier. I shouldn’t have... It was unfair of me to bring your father into an argument. I was just mad and you know how my mouth gets the better of me. I really...” Before I even realize I’ve moved, I yank the door open, causing her words to die on her lips.
The sight of her makes me feel lightheaded. She looks so small, so tiny standing in my doorway. Almost helpless. But I know better than most that Barlow Ross is far from helpless.
She takes one long look at me. From my shirtless torso to the whiskey bottle dangling from my hand, to the absolute shambles of my room, and something I can’t quite pinpoint crosses over her soft features.
Without another word, she pushes her way inside my room, her hand brushing against my stomach as she slides past me, causing goosebumps to erupt across my skin.
“What the fuck are you doing?” I bite, but it doesn’t have the harshness I intend for it to have.
“What did you do?” She looks around the room, taking in the chaos.
“Thought it was about time I unpack.” I grunt, lifting the whiskey bottle to my lips.
“Atlas.” She shakes her head slowly as she turns back toward me. “Is this because of me?” She gestures around the space.
I snort. “Don’t give yourself that much credit. Despite what you may think, I don’t give a second thought to the shit that you say to me.”
Lies. Lies.
It’s all lies.
Fuck, everything that leaves my mouth anymore is a fucking lie.
“Right.” She takes a deep inhale through her nose as she looks down at the floor.
