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I can’t think. Hell, I can’t breathe.
All I know is that I want him. For reasons I don’t understand and can’t begin to explain, I want him.
He arches upward, giving room to slide his pants over his hips, his boxers going with the denim. I gasp when he relaxes back down and the warm flesh of his erection presses against me.
Wrapping a hand around the back of my neck, he pulls my face back down to his, kissing me slow and deep.
I’m a pool of emotions.
Lust the most prominent of them all.
I whimper when he pulls away. My eyes follow his movements as he reaches down and fishes something out of the pocket of his jeans that are bunched at his ankles. My frazzled brain has trouble understanding what he’s doing until he resurfaces with a condom between his fingers.
My gut instinct is to ask why he has a condom so readily available, but quickly decide that I don’t want to know.
“Put it on me.” His voice is husky, strained. Knowing he’s just as affected by me as I am by him gives me courage I might otherwise not possess.
Without a word, I take the condom from him, tearing the wrapper with my teeth as he watches me with hooded lids.
Tossing the wrapper over my shoulder, I lean back against his knees, sucking in a hard breath as my eyes take in the size of him. My blood heats in anticipation and before I can talk myself out of it, I place the condom over the tip of his erection and very slowly and purposefully roll it over his thickness.
Gripping my hips, he pulls me upward.
“Let me,” I tell him, my voice soft.
He nods once, loosening his hold but not letting go. I hold his gaze as I slide my hand over the weight of him. His nostrils flare. His pupils dilate. I press myself up, line him at my entrance, and as slowly as I can, lower myself back down.
And still, I don’t look away. I keep my eyes locked on his. Watch the intense depths of brown turn black as I take him into my body. Feel the tremble of his legs once he’s fully sheathed inside of me. See the control he’s trying so hard to maintain as he lets me take the lead.
Slowly, I begin to move, allowing my body time to adjust to his size.
My heart thuds violently against my ribs. My lungs struggle to pull in a real breath. My entire body reacts to the feeling of him buried so deep that I don’t know where he ends and I begin.
His hands slide up my back. His lips dance across my collarbone before dipping down to my chest.
Every sensation is heightened. Every touch feels more thoughtful than the last.
I pick up speed, pressing my feet flat into the bench to give myself some leverage. Mateo immediately responds, thrusting his hips upward to match my movements.
It’s not the wild, crazy sex I would have expected from someone like Mateo. Instead, it’s so much more.
“Teach me.”His earlier words echo in my ears.
He wants me to teach him to be gentle.
He wants to be gentle for me.
And as much as I love the thought of being thrown up against the wall and fucked hard and fast, this is so much better. I get to take my time. I get to appreciate every pulse of his erection. Every hitch of his breath. Every small groan that passes through his lips.
It’s more intimate than I ever expected.
It doesn’t feel like two people taking out their frustrations on each other, which is how it started.
It feels like two people makinglove.
Not that we love each other. Of course we don’t. But I can honestly say I’ve never had sex like this before. I’ve never felt so safe yet so threatened all in the same breath. I’ve never felt the push and pull of my body as my head and heart wage war on one another. And I’ve never felt more power over a man than I do as I watch Mateo start to come apart beneath me.
My release surges forward. I become more frantic, chasing the sweet relief I so desperately need. I tug at his silky strands of hair. His fingers dig into my hips. I scratch his shoulder, as he grazes my nipple with his teeth.
We’re like caged animals that have broken free into the wild. Everything we’ve been taught, everything we know, blows away with the wind as it whips around us. We chase the thrill and pleasure, clawing, kissing, pulling, and pushing, bringing each other to the very top until I’m certain my body can take no more.
Then his lips find mine again, and together we fall away into the abyss.
