Page 76 of Once a Month


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“Is she here tonight?”

“Yes. I was just going to go over to her.”

“Well, better make sure no one else snaps her up if you like her.”

“And do you like yours?”

“She’s not mine,” she says seriously.

“Oh, I didn’t mean it like that,” I reply, realizing how that must have sounded.

She sighs and says, “It’s been two years.”

“That’s a long time,” I reply.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” I say.

“Are you…” The woman takes a step toward me. “When you’re not here, are you with women, or men, or both, or neither? I don’t know exactly what I’m asking.”

“I’m gay,” I say, helping her out.

“So is she,” she says.

“You’re not, though,” I say.

“I used to think so,” she replies. “Honestly, I wonder now. I’ve always found women attractive. I even thought about experimenting in college like everyone else, but I didn’t. Then I got married, and I figured that was it.”

“But?”

“But, when my husband climbs on top of me the three times a month, or so he wants to have sex, all I can think about is her,” she replies. “It’s the one thing that gets me through knowing that he’s fucking his Director of Sales and that I have to wait until the next month to see her.”

I nod and say, “You like her.”

“I do,” she says. “We have a lot of sex.” She laughs. “But we talk, too. She’s so smart. She’s only doing this to put herself through school. We’re completely different and wrong for each other, and we met under the strangest circumstances, but no one has ever made me come how she can.” The woman pauses. “And no one has ever made me feel how she can, either.”

“Does she know how you feel?”

“No,” she says, laughing. “And I can’t tell her, either. What’s the point? I’m still married, and she’s young and will find someone else. She’ll stop doing this once she’s paid everything off, and I’ll lose her. At least, I have right now. I’ll have the time we had together.”

I look over at the bar, and she’s no longer standing there – she’s walking toward me with a smile on her face, and I can’t help but smile back.

“Oh, no,” the woman next to me says when she notices what I’m staring at. “You too?”

“What?” I look at her.

“Nip it in the bud before you’re just like me, getting through the month just to see her again.”

“I–” But I can’t say anything because it’s too late; I’m already there.

“Hi,” she says, handing me a cocktail. “I hope this is okay.”

I don’t even know what the drink is, but I say, “It’s perfect. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” she says. “So, I hear there’s a room reserved for us tonight.”

“There is, yes,” I reply, smiling at her.

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