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And instead, somehow she’d let us down—let him down. The power I’d just seen in her had left her the moment the freezer lid had closed. She’d been as helpless as I was in the grips of an asthma attack. I might not have fully understood why that had infuriated my best friend quite so forcefully, but remembering it, I bristled on his behalf.
And possibly my own as well. I had to admit that after seeing her brave the piranhas in my tank, becoming more radiantly defiant with every passing minute, some part of me had started to bet on her success. A sinking sensation of disappointment had passed through my gut as Rowan had hauled her quaking body out of the freezer.
My next question came out harsher than I’d intended. “Why are you even here?” She’d failed; she’d faltered. She should be able to see she didn’t have any real place after all. She obviously didn’t enjoy the groupie life. I honestly didn’t understand what she hoped to gain at this point. It made no logical sense.
She looked up to glower at me over her shoulder. “I told you, the exercise clears my head.”
“No,” I said. “Why are you still here at all? Things have only gotten worse for you. You should just leave.”
She snorted. “So I’ve heard. Rowan has already given me several variations of that suggestion. Oh, and Anthea too. Guess what—it hasn’t worked.”
“I think it should be pretty clear by now that you don’t belong with us.”
She pushed back to her feet with an ease of movement I couldn’t help envying. “Why, because I freaked out this morning? Are you going to tell me that you’ve let one moment of weakness defineyou?”
A prickle ran down my spine. How much had the other guys told her about my situation when I wasn’t there? “It was more than a moment,” I insisted, ignoring the discomfort that rose up at her question.
“And I’ve had tons more moments when I did more than any of you ever expected. I don’t see why one flaw should cancel everything else out. Why do you?”
“Like Wylder said—”
“Stop with Wylder’s bullshit,” she snapped. “He’s trying to scare me off, but it’s not going to happen. That night when I was surrounded by the men who were slaughtering my family one by one, I decided that I was going to survive it and I was going to make Colt pay for what he’d done. I’m not stopping until he’s dead. And the Nobles are still by far my best chance of accomplishing that. Unless Wylder has me escorted out at gunpoint, I’m not going anywhere.”
Passionate determination rang through her voice. I couldn’t detect any lies in her tone. Nothing mattered to her but seeing Colt destroyed—and something in that bloodthirstiness woke up a thrum of understanding in my own blood.
“You people don’t trust me, and that’s fine, because frankly I don’t trust you either,” she continued. “We don’t need to befriends. We just need to agree to crush a common enemy. I know I can be an invaluable resource to you when it comes to the Bend. Whatever it takes, I’m going to prove I’m all in, to the point that none of you can deny it. You’ll see.”
The heartfelt declaration unnerved me more than I liked. I stepped back to the doorway. “Fine. You can stay.”
“I don’t think that’s your permission to give or take away anyway,” she retorted.
That was true. Her words made my lips twitch, but I wasn’t going to lie. I just turned my back on her and stalked away.
Neither of us had chosen our weaknesses, but they were still weaknesses. And if I hated myself for mine, why should I forgive her for hers?
