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“I can’t eventryto lie to y’all. He was amazing.Itwas amazing. Everything is amazing,” I gushed, and Alicia beamed at me from the screen.
“I’msohappy for you – and not because you got some dick,” she laughed. “You really seem to be settling into this little space you’ve been carving, and that’s a good thing.”
I sighed, then shook my head. “I dunno. It feels…. Too good to be true,” I confessed. “And Iknow, I’m not supposed to think like that, but I just… I’m trying to lean into the good, and enjoy it, but I’m worried something else is around the corner.”
“Which isnormal,” Alicia reassured. “Hell, I have the same feelingevery day.I would be more worried about you if youdidn’tfeel like that.”
“Yeah,” Dacia added. “Even between me and Alicia, I struggle with it too. Don’t beat yourself up over it – we were…traumatized. Foryears. That conditioning doesn’t magically go away because we want it to.”
I nodded. “Yeah, I get that part, completely, but… how do I get past it?”
“When you find out, spread the word,” Dacia quipped, and we laughed.
“It’s definitely a day to day thing,” Alicia said. “Just take it day by day, and in the meantime… enjoy your honeymoon phase.”
Usinghoneymoonwas a stretch to refer to Tristan and me, but I understood her overall point, and had every intention of adhering to it.
Or at leasttrying.
I finished talking with Alicia and Dacia, forcing the conversation away from me and onto them. I didn’t want this thing to be one-sided.
After I got off the phone, I grabbed some breakfast and flipped open that magazine, looking through the articles for something that might hold my interest. I smirked when my gaze landed on, “Foolproof Ways to Keep Your Boo”.
Mypersonalrelationship experience may have been lacking, but I was well-versed, generally, on what “kept” a man – he had to be obsessed, and even that was fleeting.
They were mine for the rest of their lives, though.
I flipped to the article, curious about what it might say, and had to smile when I saw the first lines.
If you’re reading this, let me be the first to tell you – you can’t keep anybody who doesn’t want to be kept. Relationships are a mutual exchange, that should be based in respect, genuine affection, and enjoyment for all involved.
If you’re feeling like you need to do something outside your sexual comfort, morals, dignity or safety, for the sake of “keeping” someone… reconsider. Love – and damn sure not “like” – should never require that.
But, if you’re in a relationship where you’re respected, cared for, supported, and loved, and feel the need to show some appreciation… we’ve got you! Here are a few moves you can consider:
Cook their favorite meal
Play out their favorite fantasy
Surprise them
Facilitate some self-care time
The list went on for a total of ten items, with each bullet followed by a paragraph of exposition and detailed suggestions.
It actually… wasn’t that bad.
In fact, it wasso“not that bad” that I got up and got myself together, to venture to the fresh market I’d come to love in the neighborhood.
grown.
Tristan was free again later this evening, so… maybe it would be a nice surprise to cook for him. I’d bet good money he wouldn’t expect it.
Ingrown, I got my little basket and started exploring the aisles, trying to decide what I would fix. I kept things simple for myself, but I was willing to put the culinary skills we’d been taught in theGardento good use. I mean, I was no gourmet chef by any means, but… I could make something happen.
I still hadn’t quite yet decided what thatsomethingwas gonna be yet when I turned another corner, spotting a familiar face.
“Kiara,” I said, surprised to see Tristan’s barely teenaged daughter out in a store in the middle of what I thought would’ve been a school day. “Why aren’t you at school?”
