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Once again, I was wide awake.
I turned my legs out of the bed, but hesitated for a moment once my bare feet sank into the lush fibers of the carpet. It probably wasn’t a good idea to go poking around Wick’s house at night, but he’d told me to make myself at home. Since sleep was obviously not on my agenda, those noodles from earlier could certainly take its place.
As soon as I stepped out of the guest room, I was bathed in darkness. Briefly, I wondered if it was some sort of security measure for the house to besoblack, but then I realized the real problem – my eyes hadn’t yet adjusted to the light.
More specifically, hadn’t adjusted to the pale blue light streaming under the door to Wick’s office, which made the rest of the house seem even blacker in contrast.
What is he doing up?
As soon as that question crossed my mind, my destination changed, and I was padding down to his office on bare feet. I wavered at the door, but then swallowed that little bit of uncertainty before I grabbed the knob and turned, pushing the door open.
Knock, Monica. You should have knocked first!
But, the door was already open now, and there he was, laptop open on the desk, leaning back in his chair with his forearm draped across his face. I didn’t even have to see his eyes to read the exhaustion that laid heavily across his shoulders, reminding me of the shared ailment – chronic insomnia – that was the reason our paths had crossed in the first place.
I started to just back out. He hadn’t moved, or looked up, so obviously he didn’t even realize I was there. But then my eyes fell on the desk again, and I couldn’t help the gasp I let out – a sound that got his attention immediately. He sat up, dropping his arm from his face to reach for his weapon. Before he pointed it, he recognized me, and opened his mouth to speak – probably to ask why I was there.
But my question was going to come first.
“Why is there a liquor bottle on the desk?” I asked, stepping forward. “Did you—”
“No. It’s not open,” he explained, looking me right in the eyes.
“Okay, but why is it here at all? I mean, this is your house, and you don’t owe me any explanations, not really, but… after that whole “precarious relationship with alcohol” thing, I didn’t think…”
I let my words trail off, not really sure how to finish the statement. And from the look on his face, Wick seemed as lost for words as I was.
“It’s… hard to explain,” he said, reaching forward to pluck the bottle from the desktop to cradle in his hands.
I crossed the room quickly, coming around to his side of the desk where I took the bottle from him, and then perched myself on top of the desk. The bottle went on the other side of me, out of sight, and out of reach.
“Try anyway.”
He chuckled, leaning back in his chair again to scrutinize me. His eyes landed on my breasts just long enough for me to realize I’d neglected to pull on a robe over my thin nightgown, then came respectfully back to my face.
“What, are you a counselor or something now? Always trying to get me to talk about my feelings.”
I shrugged. “It’s not like you didn’t play that role for me long enough. I should return the favor, right?”
“What if it doesn’t feel like a favor?”
“What if itis, even though it may not feel like it right now?”
He grunted, then propped his hands behind his head. “Am I talking to Monica, or Sandy?”
“Same girl. Stop stalling. What’s with the liquor bottle? What is it that’s driving you to want to drink?”
“It’s not that simple,” he said, shaking his head. “I don’t…wantto drink. I mean… I do. It relaxes me, mellows me out, sometimes helps me sleep, sometimes helps methink. And I just enjoy a good glass ofMauve.Sue me. Iwantto have a drink. Just one. But I don’t want the consequences. And so… I just look at it.”
I frowned, confused, as I tried to absorb what he was saying. “But…why?”
“I…” he sighed. “I can’t give you the neat explanation you’re probably looking for. What I told you is what I have.”
“No,” I shook my head. “I get that part, I’m saying… why now? What’s going on?”
His eyes went wide. “Are you seriously asking me that? I’ve got you in my house for protection because somebody has decided to wreak havoc in your life. And I… I’mmissingsomething. I can’t figure out how to fix this for you, and it’s fucking with me.”
“So you want to drink because ofme?”
