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"I caught a taxi," he says. "Didn’t you notice my ah…penis extension wasn’t parked outside?"
"Why get a taxi?"
"I didn't want to park my car here."
"Why?"
"Why do you think?" His smile leaves.
"If I had an idea, I wouldn't ask." The microwave beeps and I glance over, stomach reminding me drinking red wine when it's empty isn't smart. “Could you put a shirt on and leave now, please. I want to eat my dinner."
I stalk over to the microwave and pull out the carton. Underestimating the heat of the plastic, I drop the container and watch in disappointment as my beef madras decorates the linoleum.
"Fuck."
"Quite."
The amusement in his face does nothing to calm the situation. "If you hadn't freaked me out by being here, I wouldn't have dropped my dinner."
"Do you like pizza?" he asks.
"What's pizza got to do with this situation?"
The man sits on top of the dining table. "I'll order some for us both. If you'll put up with my company until I can find somewhere else to go."
I eye him suspiciously. "You'll leave?"
"Yeah, I can always sleep on the beach."
I'm not a hundred percent sure if he's serious or not, and I'm still wary. "Hang on."
Rooting around inside my handbag for my phone, I walk away and turn my back, dialling Gran's number.
When she answers, her West Highland terriers are yapping in the background, matching the volume of her television. "Hello?"
"It's Sky. I'm at the beach house and there's someone here who claims he’s rented the place for a month," I half-shout.
Man-whose-name-I-don't-know-even-though-he's-seen-my-underwear cocks an eyebrow at me.
"Why are you there?" asks Gran.
"You said I could stay for a week."
"In July."
"No, now."
Gran shouts at her dogs, forgetting to take the phone from her ear and I wince at the volume. "I thought you said July, honey."
Great. I knew she wasn't listening when I asked. "I told you about..." I almost remind her about Grant, but I don't want the guy knowing my business. I lower my voice, "The thing with the thing."
"Thing?"
"Yes, the thing that happened and why I want to stay here for a week. Remember?"
"You're making no sense, Sky. Have you been drinking?"
So much for escaping everything. "Has the guy paid?" I whisper. "You’ve got his details? Is he...you know...genuine."
