AllFreeNovel
Share Us
He shook his head. “You would have resisted. You wouldn’t have wanted to leave me in the lockup. You might not even have believed me. I made an executive decision. But I hated hurting you.”
“An executive decision. To totally destroy me, emotionally.” She let out a peal of hysterical laughter. “Wow. Cool as a cucumber.”
“It was the only way I could be sure you got on that plane,” he said. “I was locked up, Liv. I couldn’t protect you. There was no one to call for help. Davy was in Afghanistan. Con was on a stakeout somewhere. Kev was in trouble. The police were already pissed at me. I did what I had to do. And for the first time in fifteen years, I can stand by that decision.”
She pressed her hand against her face, like it might fall off. “It never occurred to you to contact me after?” she whispered.
“Only every single fucking minute of my life,” he said savagely. “First I thought it was safer not to get near you, while we were puzzling it out. Convincing ourselves that Kev had gone nuts was a long, gradual process. I looked for you after, but you were in Europe. Then I ended up going into the military. I looked for you when I was on leave. I saw you, once. You were out with some guy you were seeing. In Boston.”
“Oh, God.” She covered her face, shaking her head.
“I followed you around for a while, like your standard obsessed maniac,” he went on. “Then I got embarrassed at myself, and left.”
“Without ever contacting me,” she whispered.
He shook his head. “Didn’t seem right. To freak you out, disrupt your life, after years had already gone by. I figured you’d be furious. That you hated my guts. And that you’d hate them even more when I explained what I’d done. Surprise, surprise. Looks like I was right.”
She couldn’t get her quivering throat to calm down. “My whole life, my parents have jerked me around. When I met you, I thought, finally someone who’s straight with me. How ironic. When it comes to lying and manipulating, you give my mother a run for her money.”
“I’m sorry you’re so offended.” His voice was clipped. “I thought you’d be glad to know that all the nasty shit I said wasn’t true.”
“Oh. Yeah. That.” She shook with painful, ironic laughter. “Like, the pool you had going with the construction crew? Did you invent that right off the top of your head? Like, how bored you were at the prospect of deflowering me?” She grabbed the hotel phone by the bed and dialed for an outside line.
He yanked the receiver out of her hand. “Who the fuck do you think you’re calling?” he snarled.
“A cab,” she shot back. “I’m out of here. I’ve had enough of this.”
He slammed the phone back down and rolled on top of her again. “I did what I did because I loved you. Does that count for anything?”
She met his fierce gaze straight on. “If that’s what it means to be loved by you, I don’t know if I can survive it,” she said.
“No,” he said, his voice savage. “You promised you wouldn’t go cold on me. I hold you to that goddamn promise. You owe me that much.”
It was an impossible demand. He couldn’t hold her to that stupid promise. Feelings were feelings. Anger was anger. The past could not be changed. “What are you trying to accomplish by squishing me flat?” she demanded, struggling to keep her voice from shaking. “Using sexual intimidation to bully me into not being angry?”
“Sexual intimidation is as good a plan as any I can think up,” he said. “Would it work? I’ll do anything that works.”
The blaze of predatory energy from him took away what little nerve she had left. She shook her head. “Won’t work,” she whispered.
“Let’s see.” He pushed her thighs apart, fitting himself to her tender opening, and shoved himself deep inside her. “Does this work?”
She turned her crumpled, tear-blurred face away, but her body answered to his, helplessly, instinctively. Opening, yielding, rocking.
“It sure feels like it’s working,” he muttered, against her ear.
She shook her head against the crumpled wad of sheet. She would have screamed, but her throat vibrated too hard. The charge was already building, stoked by his hard, pounding rhythm. The molten eruption burst through her, wrenching jolts of dark pleasure.
Her lungs couldn’t expand, she realized, when she could think again. The solid weight of him was collapsed across her body.
She shoved at him. “Air,” she croaked. “Can’t breathe.”
He rolled off. The air was cool on her body, where the sweat had glued them together. She struggled up, reached between her legs.
Whoa. Holy crap. She was a lake. They hadn’t used a condom.
Or, to be fair, he hadn’t. She hadn’t had a thing to say about it.
Sean shot her an uneasy glance. His eyes slid away. “I didn’t mean to do that. I never…fuck.” He sounded almost bewildered.
