Page 14 of Trigger

“What’s his name?” I ask as I feel his head. He’s a little warm, but not enough to be worried about.

“Royal.” He says tiredly. I look him over before sticking my finger in his mouth.

“Well daddy, I found our issue. This little guy is starting to cut teeth early. Just get him a teething ring and some Tylenol and he’ll be just fine. How about I take him for a while, and you get stuff done that you need to?” I ask. He thinks about it for a moment before he replies.

“That would be great. You don’t mind?” I shake my head no and turn to walk out of the room. “Hey, Alanis, call me Westyn. You don’t have to call us by our road names. Even though he’s been busy, Eliot has claimed you as his ol’ lady. Being an ol’ lady of an executive officer gives you the right to call all members by their names.” I nod and walk back towards my office. I’m not sure what he meant by that, but I suppose I’ll find out soon enough.

“He’s with mom in the back.” Westyn says, breaking me from the memory. I now get what he meant. Eliot has claimed me as his ol’ lady. I’m still not sure what that means, but I hope to find out tonight when we talk. “She’s wanting to spend as much time with the grandkids as she can before they leave for the year.”

“Yeah. She asked to keep the kids tonight too. I’m glad they finally get to go. They’ve been wanting to go since I got back. They deserve it more than anyone. I’m sure you men can hold down the fort without the dads around, and us women can hold down the fort while the moms are away.” Aliana says. We talk more while we eat our lunch as we wait until it’s time to leave for Posey’s game. I guess that a lot of the members wanted to go to the games this weekend, so we’re making a trip out of it. It still catches me off guard with how they have accepted myself and Posey into their group. I’ve never had that happen before and I love the feeling of belonging that comes with it.

Posey is riding the bus with her teammates, so I don’t have to pick her up from school. Normally, we would drive home after the game, but with her having a game each day, we decided to stay instead of going back and forth. I love that we can afford to do things like that now. By the time we leave the diner, we have just enough time to drop my car off at home before we leave. Morgan is going to ride with Cameron and Susan since Susan is on kid duty today. Kelsey is also on the volleyball team, so I knew Posey would have her best friend with her on the ride. Since they day they met, they’ve been inseparable. If Kelsey isn’t at our house, Posey is at hers. I’m glad she was able to make friends so quickly, but that’s my daughter, shy but outgoing.

When I make it to the house, I quickly go inside to change into something more comfortable. I decided on a pair of navy leggings and a white tank top. I slip my feet into my flip flops, grab my bag, and make sure everything is locked up tight before meeting Eliot in the driveway just as he pulls up. I brought my tennis shoes with me so I could change into those for the game. I made sure my car was locked and got into the truck with Eliot and Morgan.

I guess he decided to ride with us instead, not that I mind. I absolutely adore Morgan. He’s came into my office a few times over the past month. He has a thing for numbers and computers. He said that he always wanted to be a medical scientist. I’m not sure how the two tie in together, but I’m just an accountant. It’s beyond my knowledge. Just from the few conversations we’ve had, I can tell he’s a bright kid with a good head on his shoulders. He told me how his mom would leave him locked in a room. He told me everything that he’s been through in his twelve years of life, and I wish, more than anything, that I could take that all away. “Hey Alanis!” Morgan greets, breaking me from my thoughts.

“Hey Morgan. How was school?” I question as I get settled in the truck.

“It was awesome. I love school. Dad said he was a straight A student but wasn’t valedictorian. I want to be just like him, but I want to be valedictorian of my class.” He shares. I look over to Eliot and see a blush on his handsome face.

“Well, if you work hard, I have no doubt that you can get there. Always work for your goals and don’t let anyone influence what you truly want out of life.” I tell him. I know this from experience. I was always living to make my parents happy and then when I got pregnant, they turned their backs on me. “Are you excited to go to the games and have a weekend away?”

“Yes. Dad said that Posey is my sister now. He said that since he claimed you as his ol’ lady, it’s like you two are married now in the biker world.” I gasp and whip my head towards the man driving. “Does that mean you’re my mom now?” I’m not sure what to say. This is happening so fast.

“Well, don’t you want to hold that position for your mom?” I question. I see rage, pure rage, and I instantly know I said the wrong thing.

“No. I don’t. She wasn’t my mother! She was mean and abusive. She is nothing to me. All she ever did was punish me and leave me in the room! She’s nothing to me.” He yells. I jump and Eliot curses before pulling off to the side of the road. Once he’s stopped, he jumps out and into the back of the truck.

“Morgan. Look at me.” He grabs his sons face and turns him to look at him. I can see him starting to calm the more his father talks to him. I’ve never seen him get so angry before. “She didn’t know. I haven’t told her yet. You’re never going back to her again. I promise. You’re safe here.”

“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap. I’ve been doing so good about it!” He seems distraught over getting angry over what was done to him. I should have never brought her up.

“Hey, it’s okay Morgan. I would love to be your mom. You’re an amazing young man. This isn’t your fault. I’m sorry I brought it up. I wasn’t sure what to say, but I would love if you were a part of mine and Posey’s lives.” I tell him, grabbing his hand. He flinches and I go to pull my hand away, but he squeezes it tightly, not letting me go.

“Are you okay now? Can we go watch the game? We’ll swim in the pool later. Why don’t you listen to your music?” After Morgan nods, Eliot gets back into the driver’s seat. I watch as Morgan puts his earbuds in and starts listening to his music. My heart aches for this kid and I vow, then and there, that I will do anything to make sure he has the life he should have had all these years.

Trigger

When Morgan first arrived at the clubhouse with Megan, he would freak out every time he saw her. He was worried that he would have to go back with her. He would have sudden outbursts of anger if her name was even mentioned around him. He started going to see Ali a few times a week. We were able to drop the visits to once a week starting next week. The outburst he had in the truck was unexpected. Alanis handled it like a champ though. I hadn’t been able to talk to her about his mental and physical health since we just started talking again since she came here. I knew how she was doing because I had a prospect on her. Just because I was busy with my son, didn’t mean I have eyes on my woman. I needed to get my shit handled before we combined our lives as one.

After we got back on the road, Morgan put on his calming music and fell asleep shortly after. It wasn’t a long drive, just a couple hours, but his episodes take a lot out of him. I’m pretty sure he gets part of that attitude from me, but a big part also plays into the fact that his mother did what she did to him. He’s got big aspirations for his life, and I’ll be damned if anyone holds him back from achieving his goals. I’ll make damn sure he gets everything he wants out of life. If he wants a new mom, I’ll give him that. I can never replace his mother, but I can give him someone better and I can also tell that I chose right in claiming the woman sitting next to me staring out of the window. I’ve had her hand in mine since we took off again and she hasn’t moved once.

We have about twenty minutes left until we reach the hotel where we’re staying. We decided to make an impromptu mini vacation out of it before the parents leave for their trip. I’m pretty sure they decided to travel around the UK over the year. After the game we decided to go out to dinner and then back to the hotel to hang out. I decided to go ahead and explain what I can because when we get into that room tonight, there won’t be much talking between us. I plan on being buried deep inside her sweet heat until the sun rises.

“When Morgan first came to the clubhouse with Megan, he was trying to get Aliana to stop attacking her. When Megan and I were together in high school, I thought she was the one for me. I was going to ask her to marry me right after graduation, but she didn’t show. When I went to her house, I found a note telling me that she was killed in a hit and run. The note made it out to seem as if she was sneaking out to meet me, but she was going to meet her other boyfriend. Anyway, she came to the clubhouse last month and Aliana went after her. Everyone knows what her leaving did to me. It sent me to a dark place.” I start, bringing her out of her thoughts.

“So, when she showed up and Ali was on her, Morgan was screaming for her to stop because she was hurting his mom. I later found out that he was more scared of his mother locking him up in a room again after finally getting out. When he told me everything that she had done to him, I saw red. I’m still trying to learn everything that happened, but I wanted to put a bullet in her head, and I have never wanted to harm a woman, but with every truth that came out, I wanted to hurt her. Over the past month, I’ve been taking Morgan to doctors’ appointments, appointments at the school to see where he was intellectually and taking him to appointments with Ali.” She’s listening to me intently and squeezing my hand every so often.

“I found out that he’s a year behind where he should be, so I was working with the school to get him in the same classes as Murdock because the two of them became instant friends. Murdock can calm him down easier than I can, which I still don’t understand, and I don’t think I ever will. It’s a bond that they formed from the first time they met.” I take deep breath before continuing.

“At the doctors, they ran every test under the sun, and determined he was just severely malnourished. He was lucky to come out of that situation without anything major wrong medically. With his education and medical stuff taken care of, I was still waiting for word from Aliana about his mental health. It turns out he has intermittent explosive disorder. He has burst of rage, as you saw, when Megan’s name is even mentioned. It was even worse when she was around. With Ali seeing him constantly and his medication, and his calming music that he listens to, he’s gotten better. That’s the first episode he’s had in two weeks. I know it’s not going to go away overnight, and I don’t expect it to. That’s why he exploded when you brought her up.”

She’s quiet for a minute, digesting what I had just told her. I hope she doesn’t think it’s too much to handle. I want her in our lives and Morgan does as well. “I understand why you disappeared for the time that you did. However, I wish you would have come to me. I would have loved to help with it all. You claimed me that day and then just disappeared. I’ve got too much going on to play games. I’m not going to sit at my phone waiting for you to call. I’ve got a teenage daughter and a full-time job.” I understand where she’s coming from.

“I never thought I would let another woman into my life. After how broken I was after I found out about Megan’s death, I closed myself off. I went into the Marines and did two tours, instead of one, before I came home and took over for my father. I had my heart enclosed in a block of ice that was encased in cement. Those layers were surrounded by walls that should have been impenetrable, but the moment my son came into the clubhouse, those walls and layers started crumbling. Then you walked into the clubhouse and the rest of my defenses went out the window.” I tell her. We’re about five minutes from the hotel now, and I want her to understand where I’m coming from. I want her to know that I was just worried about getting this stuff handled before she came into our lives, and I was afraid that it might be too much for her to handle.

“I haven’t been with anyone since Posey’s father. Romantically or sexually. It’s just been Posey and I for fifteen years. It’s not going to be easy getting used to having a man in my life. Let alone two of them. I’m glad that you explained everything to me. It all makes more sense and now all the puzzle pieces have started to fall into place. I would love to have you two in my life. I want to get to know you. I want to get to know Morgan and I want you two to get to know me and Posey.” She tells me. I bring her hand to my mouth and kiss each of her knuckles. We spend the rest of the ride in silence. A newfound understanding between us. I never thought I’d have an ol’ lady, but I do, and I wouldn’t change it for anything.

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