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I rehearse my responses internally as I make my way across the street. While my first attempt was a massive flop, at least it’s given me an idea of what I can expect. This time I’ll be prepared for what they ask me.
“Hi,” I say, stepping up to the host stand as the hostess smiles at me.
“Hello. How many today?”
“Oh, actually, I’m not here to eat. I was wondering, are you hiring?” I ask the young blonde in front of me.
“No, sorry.” Her face falls, and she shakes her head to emphasize the answer.
My heart sinks. Maybe I should have tried to leave things better with the convenience store person.What if they’re the only place hiring?At least he was willing to talk to me.
“I think Bennie’s might be though,” the girl offers, pointing to the restaurant across the street.
“Great.” I give her a grateful smile and walk back through the door.
As soon as I step through the next restaurant’s door, I’m met with “Hi, welcome to Bennie’s.”
“Hi,” I respond, trying to match the cheery greeting. “I’m looking for a job and heard you were hiring.”
“You’re in luck,” the tall brunette says. “My name’s Harmony. I’m the manager.”
I take her hand and give it a firm shake. Finally, a bit of luck. “I’m Winter.”
“Nice to meet you, Winter. Why don’t we take a seat?” Harmony gestures to a booth, and as I lead the way, I feel her eyes travel down to the baby bump that’s just starting to show above my jeans.
When she joins me, I think I might detect a hint of reticence in her expression that wasn’t there before. But when she speaks, her tone is friendly. “Would you like a cup of coffee?” she offers.
“Wouldn’t I,” I say longingly. “But I better not.” I place my hand over my baby bump with a smile, and she responds in kind.
“Are you expecting?”
“Yes.” I release a nervous laugh. “We weren’t to start with, but I would call it a happy surprise.”
Harmony laughs lightly. “When are you due?”
“August 22,” I admit and watch her face fall ever so slightly.
“And what restaurants have you worked in before?” It might just be me, but her tone sounds more guarded than before.
“None, actually. But I promise I’m a quick study and a hard worker,” I insist, trying to redirect the conversation to why she might want to hire me.
“Not even as a host?” she presses. “How about in fast food?”
Rather than admit that I haven’t had a single job, I simply shake my head. But I can see it in Harmony’s eyes. The reasons for not hiring me are stacking up too quickly.
“I have plenty of experience eating at restaurants,” I joke, trying to offer a bit of levity.
Harmony responds with a laugh, but it’s clearly out of sympathy. “Well, why don’t you leave your resume with the host, and I’ll get back to you when we have an opening.” Before I can respond, Harmony slides out of the booth and starts to walk away. “Congratulations on your baby, and have a great day!” she calls over her shoulder.
Tears of frustration sting my eyes.How the hell am I supposed to find a job when no one will give me a chance? How do other people do it when they’re first starting out?Sliding back out of the booth, I make my way to the door and step back onto the pavement. It’s been a steep learning curve so far, and if I’m not careful, I’m going to run out of places to apply in this tiny town.
Rather than walking to the next shop down the street, I take a seat on the bench outside and unlock my phone. Googling ways to go about an interview, I try to better understand all the pitfalls that might hinder me. I take my time running through all the concerns people might have when hiring and realize I’m probably more of a liability. No one wants to hire a pregnant girl. Then they’ll put in all the time for training only to have her leave. And employees with no work history can easily prove either flaky or unable to keep a job. The references the man asked for at a convenience store, I guess are to speak to others about my work ethic and reliability. In short, I have no qualifications that would make anyone want to hire me.
Still, I’m determined to press on. And fortified with my newfound knowledge, I slowly make my way down the street. One by one, each business disqualifies me. Restaurants, flower shops, hardware stores, and greeting card shops alike, they all reject me for one reason or another. Though no one specifically tells me they won’t hire me because I’m pregnant, I can see it by the way their expressions change when they realize I am.
By my twelfth try, I’m completely demoralized and ready to take a break. Stepping into a little sandwich shop for a bite to eat, I peer up at the chalkboard menu and consider what I might want. I can’t have deli meat, which is mainly what they’re offering. Finally, I spot an egg salad sandwich and order that along with a lemonade. I barely have enough cash to cover my meal, so I don’t bother with the chips, though I would have enjoyed a bag.
Then I take my meal to the table next to the window and watch the pedestrians strolling by the window as I eat. The sandwich is quite good, and it settles my raw stomach, but still, I can’t seem to shake my feeling of utter defeat.After working so hard to convince Gabriel that I should get a job, what if I can’t manage to find anyone who will hire me?
