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“What the hell is this?”Grant asked between clenched teeth while staring at a smug Alpha Morales leaning against a police cruiser in the hotel parking lot.
Tati stood next to him as they stared at the tugboat of a 1970s cruiser that had seen better days.
Morales, twirling what must have been the keys to the eyesore around his finger.
Despite Grant’s very pointed glare, Tati avoided him as she snatched the keys from Morales’s finger and simply replied with, “What do you mean, what is it? You’d think you of all people would recognize a standard issue Dodge Monaco police cruiser, complete with a 440 cubic inch V-8 and a four-barrel carburetor.”
“Yes, I am well aware of the make and model, having watched all of the police chase scenes inThe Dukes of Hazzardwhile in elementary school. And despite being oddly aroused by your knowledge of what’s under the hood, I’m going to have to ask you again, what the hell is this?”
How was he going to convince anyone this was an official law enforcement vehicle in this piece of archaic shit?
Tati blew him off with, “How do you expect to pull Hillsboro over, with an ounce of credibility, without a police car?”
Grant closed his eyes, and it took everything in his power not to face-plant into the palm of his hand at the ridiculous clown car before him.
Alpha spoke up. “My ex-girlfriend, Tati, asked me, as a personal favor to her and our past ever so passionate relationship, to provide a police cruiser. And voila!”
Grant sniffed with contempt. “You couldn’t find something a little less outdated?”
Tati answered for Alpha, “Beggars can’t be choosers, Grant. You think it’s more convincing to pull someone onto the side of the highway driving a Honda Accord with a rental sticker on the bumper? Get in.”
He opened the passenger door and checked out the inside that looked as if the last time it was cleaned was in the late seventies or eighties. About the same time it was forced into retirement.
“I’ll drive while you put on your uniform.” She jumped into the driver’s seat, manually rolled down the window and said to Morales, “I’m going to need you to create a distraction once we arrive at the estate. Nothing too over-the-top. Just enough of a head-turner that will distract the guards long enough to allow us to get inside and get to Flynn, Birdie, and Lucas.”
Morales lifted her hand from the steering wheel and kissed the back of it. “Anything for you, mi amor.”
Grant searched for the button on the archaic gunmetal gray device that turned on the antiquated bubblegum light on the top of the cruiser.
As he punched buttons, Tati continued to banter with Morales, “What happened with Judith? She get tired of having to sweep up your Dorito chips from the cushions of her couch or cancel your porn subscriptions on her AMX?”
“We had a mutually agreed upon dissolution of our relationship.”
“So basically, she got sick of your shit?”
“We decided that although we shared sexual chemistry, we were otherwise ill-suited.”
“So…you hit on her sister?”
“Her maid. But in my defense, she was adorable, with a cleft chin and a button nose and a very round, delectable— ”
“Jesus, Morales,” she interrupted with a wrinkled nose. “Just be ready with a distraction when I call it in.” She turned the key in the ignition, moving the car into park with the gearshift that protruded from the steering wheel column.
Grant smelled something musty. Like decades of spilt coffee and mouse droppings. Dear God. It would be a miracle if they made it to the highway, let alone across town in time to circumvent the perp. Um, doctor.
While driving in the direction of Hillsboro’s residence, Tati received a call and huffed, “What, Morales?” She paused. “He’s driving north on Scarsdale? Good. Yes. Thank you. What? I said thank you. What do you want, a piece of candy? The new limited-edition LEGO set? Jesus, grow up.”
She pressedEndas Grant finished pulling on his uniform. He had to admit the process would have been more difficult in his Tahoe PPV with the laptop and all of the standard issue peripheral devices requiring connectivity.
“So, you and Morales,” he said, clicking his seat belt on.
“There is no me and Morales.”
“As hard as it is for me to believe, I think there used to be.”
Tati white-knuckled the large steering wheel, hands in the ten and two position and straightened in her seat. “Look, if you tell anybody, I swear to God I will deny it and remove each of your pubic hairs, one by one, with a pair of tweezers.”
“So youwerea couple.”
