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While Katrina was in labor, I had a bassinet delivered, along with everything else a newborn could possibly need. She tries to hide her smile when she notices it as she enters our room, watching me out the corner of her eye while I settle Capree in the center of the miniature crib, on her back. I then take off my pants and shirt, while Katrina stays in her sweatpants and T-shirt, and it doesn’t take long for her breathing to even out after she crawls beneath the covers. I lie beside her, my mind always working.
I come up with my to-do list while she’s sleeping, and as I sneak out of the bed, Capree begins to whimper. I stop, not knowing if I should allow her sounds to wake Katrina or if I should deal with it.
I end up deciding Katrina needs her sleep. I pick up our baby and sit in the rocking chair I also had delivered. I take in Capree’s every feature as I rock back and forth, and it doesn’t take long for her to settle down and sleep peacefully.
I startle awake to an unknown sound, my hands immediately feeling for Capree, but she’s no longer in my arms. I stand quickly, looking around the floor, wanting to kick my own ass. I know better than to fall asleep holding a baby.
“She’s safe. I have her.”
Instantly, I pull my gun, it taking a second for me to understand I’m in my room with my wife and child.
Slowly, I put my gun away. “Sorry,” I apologize, my voice gruff with sleep. I hadn’t even realized I was tired.
“You two were adorable,” Katrina answers, not looking fazed at having a gun aimed at her. I guess she’s used to it by now. I sit back down and watch as she feeds our baby.
“I don’t even remember falling asleep.” My hand strokes down my beard, still feeling groggy from the nap. I rarely ever sleep that deep.
Chapter 17: Katrina
I’vebeenabletogo back and forth between my house and Demetri’s for the last week. While Demetri goes to work, I run back home to be there with my family during the day, and my best friend covers for me at night.
I’m going to tell them. Honest.
“I can only stay here another day or two,” Sophia says out of nowhere while she’s giving Capree cuddles. She loves her almost as much as I do. I watch as my best friend rocks my daughter while I stand in front of them.
“That’s all I need. Luca is having a christening for Capree, and right after that, I plan to let everyone know.”
“What if the christening is an excuse to get you to the church, and they’re really planning an arranged marriage and wedding?” Sophia asks while placing a kiss on Capree’s head.
“That’s ridiculous.” I laugh at the absurdity, while her face is completely straight and serious. “My family wouldn’t do that.” But self-doubt creeps in.
Her brow rises. “They haven’t mentioned marrying you off, since you’re a single mother?”
“That would be a good way to start a war,” I scoff.They would never force me….
“I’m just saying, things have a way of not turning out how you expected them. You already harbor so much guilt. Just tell them.”
I hate that she’s so right. I’m causing more harm than good by having this dual life. “To be fair, Demetri is still holding his life back from me too. I haven’t met his older daughter yet. It’s like he’s trying to keep us separate. I’m not the only one who is living two lives right now. I just don’t know why he doesn’t want us to meet.”
“You gave your daughter the same name as his older one. Maybe he took offense to it.”
“What’s with the tough love? I thought you were on my side. Anyway, I thought that name could unite them. It’s something they share as sisters. I didn’t do it to be malicious.”
She’s eyeing me, and I hate it. “What the hell is that look for?”
“You didn’t do it because you were jealous he already had a daughter? Maybe wanted Capree to replace her?”
“No.” I shake my head. “I love children. And no matter what, I will love Charlotte like she’s my own blood. All he has to do is give me the chance.”
“All right,” she concedes, passing Capree to me.
I breathe her in. She has that newborn baby smell. She helps the tension uncoil from each of my nerves. Everything will be okay.
“I promise this will be your last night here. Thank you for helping me.” We stand and give each other a hug, Capree in the middle of it.
Aswearriveatour new house, I check the time. Another hour and Demetri should be home. I walk in with takeout and plan to put it on dishes so it looks like I cooked for most of the afternoon. He’ll never suspect we were gone.
“Hello, wife.”
