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6
My heart was racing, and I paced near the tunnel, my whole body tense. My wolf wanted to leave Star’s enclave. She wanted to go to Tyler. Was that what she’d run for? Was that why I couldn’t control her?
I tried to win over my wolf side, to remind her that Tyler was bad. I’d never felt more divided from my wolf. It was as if I was trapped inside her body, our souls not merging at all. We were strangers. She was in charge, and I was along for the ride.
Fear gripped me, sending icy tendrils through me. I had to change this. I couldn’t let my wolf stray from me. We had to be united.
She stepped toward the large rock that enclosed the tunnel and pawed at it. With a whine, she tried to push on the rock.
Stop it.I was screaming internally, desperate to connect with her. It wasn’t working.We need to go back. Our friends are waiting.
There was no concern for what we’d been working on, only a sense of urgency to get out of here and find our mate.No. Not our mate. We broke that bond.
She growled and pawed at the stone again. This time, she was more aggressive, leaning into it with her whole weight. It still didn’t budge.
My pulse was sky high, but with each failed attempt to remove the stone, I felt relief.
You can’t do it alone. Go back.
The cry of another wolf sounded behind us and we turned to face three wolves. I could sense my friends in each of their shifted forms. Sheila, Malcom, and Kyle had all come for me.
My wolf growled.
Down, girl. Those are our friends.
Sheila’s wolf moved closer. Her fur was like midnight. So black it was almost blue but as she moved into the tunnel, she nearly blended with the shadows.
I could feel her emotions. Concern radiated from her in waves. She stopped a few feet from me and lifted her chin, a clear indication that she wanted me to follow.
My wolf resisted at first, but I was using everything I had to encourage her to go.Come on. Please.
She didn’t want to leave with our friends. My wolf was only thinking about her mate and how he was out there, waiting for us. It was chilling. A horrible twisted, conflicted feeling of both desire and disdain.Even if I wanted to go out, it’s impossible to move the rock. You won’t win this.
My wolf was furious and I could feel the connection we’d forged slipping even more. She didn’t trust me, and she didn’t want to connect with me. Being unable to connect with your wolf was every shifter’s worst nightmare. How had this happened?
Star’s spell came to mind, and I cursed myself for being so stupid. I’d severed the connection to Tyler with my human form, but it seemed to be magnified in my shifted form. Not only that, but I’d risked the connection with my inner wolf.
I wanted to say it wasn’t worth it but being able to resist the pull to Tyler in any form was progress.You know he will cage us if he catches us. We’ll never be free.
My friends yelped, and my wolf turned to look at them. I could feel her resistance fading.That’s it. Back to our friends who care about us. They need us, and we need them.
She looked back at the barrier, longing tugging deep at my soul. I knew she was desperate to get to Tyler, but the human part of me couldn’t feel it at all. My wolf and I were closed off from each other, two separate halves not functioning together at all. I’d broken my connection with my wolf for a chance to free myself from Tyler.
Sheila’s wolf was right in front of me now, she sat down, waiting and patient. My wolf was pulled into the calm sensation of her friend’s presence, and I could feel her urgency subsiding.
It’s time. I encouraged.We can deal with this later. Just go with your friends.Finally, my wolf walked forward. Shelia turned and walked toward the others and the four of us exited the tunnel.
We got about halfway to Star’s house when my body began to give way. I shivered, then collapsed, unable to make myself move. It was as if my wolf had given up. She wasn’t going to walk any farther.
Terrified, I tried to reach out to her, to connect with her. I was met with nothing. No connection, no resistance even, just my human form. It was as if my wolf was gone.
My body began the change, shaking, breaking, reforming. Finally, I was hunched over on all fours, my hands and knees sinking into soft dirt, in human form.
Everything hurt. My head throbbed, my arms and legs ached. It was as if I’d just experienced a beating, not a shift. Cautiously, I pushed myself up to standing and looked at my friends. They were still in their wolf forms, but I could tell they were concerned.
“I’m okay,” I lied. “Let’s get back, then you can shift.”
I was most definitely not okay. I’d lost my connection to my wolf. Worse, I’d felt the pull to Tyler in a more intense way than I ever had before. In the past, I’d been able to resist the bond when my wolf had pushed back. I’d been able to reason with her, explain to her why he was wrong for us. This time, she hadn’t cared. She wanted Tyler at all costs.
