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Maddie let out a soft snort and pulled back to meet my eyes. “I’m going to do my best to keep up with the rest of you, even if you’ve all been through a lot more of this kind of thing than I have. My dad deserves justice for what was done to him. My mom deserves to know what really happened.”
I touched her cheek. “You deserve closure too, Maddie.”
She gazed back at me, her eyes darkening with concern. “How areyoudoing? What you had to do in the warehouse—the way this investigation has been going—you don’t deserve to have to fight for your life against criminals who’ve killed who knows how many people.”
The fact that she could worry about me even while she was dealing with so much of her own trauma made my heart swell with affection, but my stomach lurched at the same time. Whenever the memories flickered up of the moment when I’d had to stab that thug before he could off me, I felt like vomiting.
We had good reasons for doing what we did. Ultimately, we were doing what we could to set things right in the world. But that didn’t mean I always enjoyed the shit we ended up immersed in.
“I’ll be okay,” I told Maddie. “We’ve seen… a lot, over the years. When you’re dealing with people that tough, you learn to toughen up too.” At least when you were staring them down face to face. Not always when you were alone in the privacy of your own bedroom, but I didn’t need to mention that. “It’ll be worth it if we can finally find out what happened to your dad.”
“That shouldn’t be your responsibility.”
I stroked my thumb over her cheek, my discomfort vanishing as I took in her gorgeous face and the compassion shining in her eyes. “I’m happy to take it up. Especially when I know how much it means to you.”
Her lips pursed for a second, and I couldn’t resist them once my attention had been drawn there. I leaned in, and she tipped her head to meet me.
Our mouths brushed against each other, a ghost of a kiss turning into something deeper. This part, I knew how to do right. I tangled my fingers in her hair and hummed encouragingly when she gripped the front of my shirt.
But after another kiss that left my heart racing, she eased back, her stance tensing a little. “I— You should probably know, Logan and I have started to work things out between us. I’m not sure how that’s going to go, but I can’t say it’s goingnowhere…”
Ah, that explained a few things, mostly about my best friend’s change in attitude. I arched my eyebrows at her. “You already told me you were still playing the field. I don’t mind if you’re into both of us. Have all the fun you want.”
The words had only left my mouth when I realized howIfelt about it might not be the problem at all. Logan had obviously taken issue with my interest in Maddie from the start. He’d backed off on the jealous rages, but he still didn’t seem happy about it. If he was trying to make a move on her, he probably minded very much that she was still involved with me.
And what if she wanted him more than she wanted me? It wouldn’t be so surprising, would it?
I backed up a step, an embarrassed heat filling my chest. “Of course, ifhe’dhave a problem with it—if you want to focus on seeing where things could go with him… I’m not going to pitch a fit about it. I know he was in your life first.”
Maddie’s brow furrowed. “What are you saying? You figure he would get first dibs because I knew him before I knew you?”
I rubbed the back of my neck. “I mean, basically? I don’t want to mess anything up for you if—”
“Slade,” Maddie cut in, with an edge of irritation in her voice, “please don’t tell me you buy into that kind of chauvinistic bullshit. Nobody gets toreserveme for later dating. I’m not an object available first come, first serve.”
Okay, when she put it that way, it did sound like some kind of bullshit. I had the urge to bite my tongue off. “I was just trying to say… I want you to be happy. I’m not going to get in the way ofthat. If you’d be happier with him.”
She glowered at me, but her shoulders had come down a little. “That wasn’t what I was trying to say. I still wantyou. We’ve had a lot of fun together already, and he’s been a jerk about a lot of this. You’ve made me happy while he was acting like an asshole. I’m just in a muddle about that too, trying to figure out where I stand and how this whole playing the field thing is going to work. I’m trying to be upfront with you about the situation.”
A different sort of embarrassment flashed through me alongside my relief. I’d come up with this whole scenario where she picked Logan over me out of thin air. Or maybe because it wouldn’t be the first time someone I’d assumed cared about me walked the other way.
I’d been bracing myself to get abandoned all over again, because it’d mattered to me that she might. This woman had gotten under my skin even more than I’d realized.
But gazing into her determined eyes, I couldn’t say I had a problem with that.
“I appreciate that,” I said. “And I’m sorry for jumping to conclusions. You’d better believe I wantyou, Piccolina, as long as you’re on board.”
I grasped her hand again, a smile returning to my face. “You know what, I think we probablyallneed to take a break and burn off some steam. To have fun without worrying about where it’ll lead. Let’s go grab the others and head to that club downtown. I can’t wait to see what else we can do on that dance floor.”
CHAPTERTEN
Madelyn
The Vigil guys so often shared Logan’s car that I hadn’t realized Slade had one of his own until tonight. As he pulled the low-key but sporty blue Subaru up to the curb outside the club, his phone chimed with an incoming text. He pulled up the parking brake and checked the message. “Logan and Dexter are on their way. Not without a little grumbling from the boss about the reports we were supposed to deliver.” He flashed a grin at me. “He’ll get over it.”
“I don’t think I’m going to forget what I saw anytime soon,” I said, pushing open the passenger door. “But I wouldn’t mind getting distracted from it for an hour or two.”
“I’ll make that my new mission, then.” Slade swooped around the car, incredibly nimble as always despite his prosthetic, and grasped my hand as he closed the door for me. “Would you like a drink first or to head right onto the dance floor, Piccolina?”
