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“Look, I know why you’re trying to hide this. You think if our parents know that you’ll be yanked out of school and put in some special treatment program, maybe in Switzerland.”
My mouth drops open. “Have you heard something?” I ask. Fear makes my heart race. I wasn’t aware that Nate knew of my mom’s desire to take me out of Chicago, out of the country.
“Only that it’s an option, and we all want to make sure it’s an option that doesn’t become necessary.” Nate stops talking and leans toward the interior of the room. The clanging noises have stopped. “All good?” he calls.
“Yup.” It sounds like there is more than one guy in here. I’m so embarrassed.
“Nate, I can’t be in here.” I’m feeling queasy, and it’s not due to my condition. Perhaps other girls would love to be in the boys’ locker room, but for me it’s kind of stinky and I don’t want to see a bunch of my classmates’ underwear or worse. I’d never be able to look them in the eye again.
“Yes, you can.” He drags me into the room. Along the way I see several guys who give Nate chin nods and questioning looks, but no one stops him. Maybe girls in the boys’ locker room is an ordinary occurrence.
We stop at the end of the locker room where there is an office door that says “Head Coach” and then another closed door that says “Training Room.” Nate opens the training room door. Inside are two long metal tables. Nate curses when he sees the bare tables. “Hold on,” he says and then leaves.
I stand there like a fool, wondering what I should do. I don’t really want to walk out and see things that should be unseen, but I also don’t want to wait around until someone who is supposed to use this room shows up.
I’m about to leave when Nate returns, shouldering his way in, his arms full of clothes and towels. He gives me a frown when he sees my hand on the doorknob and I guiltily pull it away. Curiously I watch Nate spread out the materials. There are a couple of pairs of workout pants, the kind that have snaps on the sides so that the players can quickly disrobe. Stripper pants, I liked to think of them, although I’m sure if I said that to any of the guys they’d give me deeper frowns than the one that Nate shot me when he returned. Nate carefully positions the pants so that there isn’t much overlap. Over the pants go three large sweatshirts. When he’s done, he pats the table. “Hop up.”
“What?”
“Hop up,” he repeats.
I stand there like a dummy because I don’t get what he wants me to do. Nate shakes his head and in two steps reaches my side and propels me forward. “Charlotte, you spent your lunch hour vomiting, right?”
I really hate Claudia. She must have heard me before and decided to rat me out to Nate. “So what if I was?” I sound snippy, but I don’t even care one bit.
“So you’ve got to be worn out. You go home and pass out, our parents are going to suspect something. Work with me here,” Nate pleads. Understanding dawns. Nate wants me to take a nap while he practices football, and he hopes the extra sleep will make me appear healthier at home.
“This is really nice of you, Nate, but you don’t have to do this for me. I’m fine,” I lie, giving him a big smile.
“Charlotte, stop. If I was sick, wouldn’t you do anything you could to make me feel better, help me heal?”
I give a reluctant nod of my head.
“Then why is it pity or wrong for me to want to do the same for you?”
Shamed, I look down at the bed of garments that Nate had spread out. My throat tightens at the gentle care he’s showing me. Not wanting Nate to see me cry, I climb onto the makeshift mat and immediately I am struck by how very tired I really feel. My whole body seems to loosen up. Nate lays two towels on top of me like a blanket.
“We’ll get some better bedding in here for you,” he murmurs, stroking the side of my cheek with one long finger.
“How will you keep this a secret?” I close my eyes and revel in the sensation of his caress. I don’t know that he’s ever touched me so tenderly before.
“Only a few guys know, and they won’t say anything. They don’t care.” His voice is sounding further and further away.
“I love you, Nate,” I whisper as I let go and let sleep take me away. I dream that I hear him say “I love you” back.
7
Nathan
Charlotte, Nick, and I go to the Halloween party. Charlotte insisted when Nick and I suggested we just have an Xbox tournament and hand out candy to the kids in the building.
