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“Yes?”
“The wedding for Adam and Eve is today.”
She nodded. “I won’t attend.”
“Of course. You should rest.”
He left, and she sat there, alone, her gaze locked on the blanket.
And it all made sense… It was twisted, and yet I saw it all.
Lilith, who had been made perfect by someone else’s standards, had been cast aside and killed because she’d been in the way of someone else. She had said she wanted freedom, but I knew better.
She’d wanted to belong. To Adam, to the world, but she’d wanted it to be asherself.
Instead, she’d been murdered for it.
The loop didn’t stop right away or return to the start. Instead, it showed her witnessing the same thing, the same betrayals of the world that happened to others. Her pain ate away at me, and I felt every bit of it. Perhaps because I shared a similar pain, because I understood it, I suffered it along with her.
But it had to stop.
“You can’t do this,” I whispered.
She stopped, the scene she was in pausing as if she heard me. She turned toward me, now dressed in a slinky red dress in some night club a few decades ago. “I have to.”
“Why?”
“Becauseeveryonesuffers. Look around at all these souls here, trapped because life doesn’t work. I told you it was built on a broken premise, and now you’ve seen.”
“Just because something grows out of shitty soil doesn’t mean you should rip it out.”
“Everything was spawned by one selfish man who murdered his wife because he couldn’t bear to not control her. And what did he get for that? Punished? Cast out?No. His father rewarded him with a biddable wife, with children, with everything he’d ever wanted.That’swhy it should all be ripped out! It was all created from bad stock. A poisoned tree will give you nothing but poisoned apples.”
I struggled to argue against that…
If I’d been her, if I’d watched all the world coming from someone who’d betrayed me, I couldn’t imagine much love for any of it. Her eschewing the mortal world for the supernatural one made sense, too.
“I get it,” I told her. “I get wanting to tear apart the system because it sucks. The problem is that you end up just as bad as everything else. If you do this,youend up taking everything from someone else, someone who doesn’t deserve it.”
“So?”
“So, you know what that’s like. You’ve been there. How can you make someone else suffer like you did? Someone who doesn’t deserve it.”
She paused, frowning as the scene shifted to her on the ground, to when Lucifer had burst into the room after she’d killed Gran.
And there it was again to her. Another betrayal, and another person who was supposed to care for her tossing her aside.
Anger rushed back to the forefront, and I remembered what Hunter had told me.
“They’re just echoes. You can’t save them.”
Lilith wasn’theranymore. She was just a memory, just a loop, and no matter if I got through to her for a split second, that loop would keep going and drag her under again.
She was as trapped as anyone else, just reliving the same anger and pain over and over again.
I wanted to save her, but Icouldn’t. Whatever she could have been, whoever she could have been, had died when she’d been killed, when Adam had shoved a spear through her back, and this was nothing but an echo in time.
It was the anger of someone wronged that lingered and festered and grew.
