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I take her hand, the uninjured one, and look deep into her eyes.
‘I know that you’re probably shocked by this whole Daddy/Little thing, and I promise we’ll talk more about it later, but right now, I want to talk to you about Chris Abrams,’ I begin. Even saying that jerk’s name gives me a bitter taste in my mouth.
‘There’s more to know about Chris?’ she asks. ‘I thought you told me everything.’
I narrow my eyes at her. ‘You’ve hurt your lip. I hadn’t noticed. It’s bleeding a little. You okay?’
‘I’m fine. Tell me what you know about Chris. Tell me everything.’
I run my fingers through my hair and sigh exasperatedly. ‘Your sister told me you… I don’t know how to put this, darlin’ — without offending you — so I’m just going to come out and say it. Words were never my strong point, so here goes… Violet says you’re more easily hurt than most people. That you’re delicate... And I respect that, you know? There’s nothing wrong with being vulnerable, especially for a Little like you. Thing is, I don’t want to scare you.’
Addison scowls. ‘Honestly? When will everyone stop describing me like that? I’ve always been emotional, granted, and sure — I’m a Little — but I’m not like some fragile butterfly wing that nobody’s allowed to touch. ‘
Fair enough. She’s an adult, after all, even if she does like to act a little childish in her spare time. Fuck, I wonder whether she likes to play. I wonder what her favorite books are. I’d love to read her a story.
Keep your brain in gear, Finn.
‘In that case,’ I say, ‘I’ll tell it to you straight. Okay? I’ve just been worried about upsetting you is all. But maybe Violet is a little over-protective of you.’
‘Yeah, just abit.’ Addison snorts. It’s funny how even a snort can sound sexy if it comes from the lips of the right person.
‘The marriage was actually your father’s idea, initially,’ I tell her, deciding to just dive right in to this.
‘Pops? He wanted me to marry you? All that time ago?’
‘He said if it ever came to it, that it might not be a bad idea.’
I can tell now that she’s trying to fight the urge to react too emotionally to this. She wants me to know how mature she is. How tough. As it happens, I don’t need her to prove that to me anymore. I’m starting to see it, with my own eyes.
‘Why did my father tell you to marry me without my consent?’ she asks. ‘What on earth was his reason for that?’
‘You father knew a lot about the military. He knew about proxy marriages. That’s where a man on active duty is able to get married even when he can’t get home to attend the wedding. He knew that some states, like this one, allow them for non-military personnel too. And it got him thinking.’
‘Right…’ She shifts back on the couch a little, sitting up a little straighter. She looks so willful, and yet so vulnerable. My urge to look after her is overwhelming.
‘And he knew about Chris. What he was capable of.’
‘Chris was my first boyfriend. I always knew he was a little different to other guys, a little more impulsive, a little moreintorelationships.’
‘Obsessive, you mean?’
‘Well, I guess you could call it that. There were other problems too. Main one being that he wasn’t a Daddy. I could tell he was repulsed by me, at the same time as being desperate to impress me. It drove him crazy. It wormed away in him, making him jealous, in case I met someone who was better suited to me. He used to phone me every night, didn’t like me hanging around other guys, got mad real easy.’
‘But let me guess,’ I say, ’you lost your cherry to him, and you felt like you owed him something. So, when he proposed, you felt like you had to say yes, out of obligation.’ It’s a callous thing to say, and I instantly regret it.
Addison’s eyes burn with such fury that they no longer look green at all. More like the color of a tree on fire. ‘You know about the engagement?’
‘Your father and I chatted a lot,’ I say. ‘We talked while I worked on his home. He trusted me.’
She snorts again, but it’s more subdued this time.
‘We were only engaged for a matter of hours,’ she tells me. ‘I’d been too scared to say no when he asked, because of the way he was. And I hoped that maybe he could change, that maybe hewouldchange. But when he didn’t, when I realized he couldn’t, I worked up the courage to break it off. Chris had been getting more and more intense. And not in a good way. Marrying him would have been a disaster.’
‘Your father said if he ever went full-on psycho, the only way he’d ever stop chasing you is if he found out you were married.’
Addison’s eyes widen as she pieces this together.
‘It started off as a joke, really,’ I explain. ‘He said it could be me who married you, that I could get one of these proxy marriages. That you wouldn’t even have to attend the wedding. But that it would keep you safe. Then, over the next few weeks, when Chris started acting crazier, I think, for your father, the plan got more serious.’
