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The difference now is that I fight against it. Can’t let myself enjoy her. Not for a second. ‘We’ll get a diaper on you back at my cabin,’ I say, trying to soothe Addy. She needs something, but I’m not sure I can give it to her right now. She nods, and the look on her face is unreadable.
When we get back to the cabin, my landline is ringing. I only installed that for emergencies. That doesn’t bode well.
It's the sheriff.
‘There’s been a break-in at Georgie Brown’s property. Two men in baseball caps.’
‘Shit. She alright?’
‘I’m going to need you to get over here, Finn. Now.’
11
ADDISON
It's a long, awkward drive to the sheriff's department.
Finn is barely saying a word. I don’t get it. He seems furious with me.
He was the one that kissedme, so why is he acting like I forced myself upon him? Did he just get swept up in the moment, lose himself for a second? Is he somehow blaming me for that fire?
I shift around in the passenger seat. Even in track pants and a cotton sweater, I feel like I can’t get comfortable. I got into a diaper quickly at the cabin, but it’s not that. I must have overdone it heading up that hill today. And standing there kissing Finn, for what must have been a full fifteen minutes, like a couple of horny teenagers… I must have put a lot of pressure on my ankle without even realizing. At the time, I was too busy floating on cloud nine to notice.
I should have been scared up there in a wooden tower with lightning cracking down all around me, but I wasn’t. Not when I was with him. Not when his mouth was planted firmly over mine.
Of course, I’ve kissed guys before, and not just Chris. There was a boy in high school, who I shared my first kiss with, then a quiet guy I dated a couple times after Chris. That must have been during the time that Chris was in prison.
None of those kisses, though — notoneof them — was even a tenth as powerful as locking lips with Finn Wilder.
That man was like ananimal. There was no time to think about what I was doing. All I could do was follow him, wherever he wanted to take me. He was totally in charge, totally dominating. A true Daddy Dom. It was like I was a well, and he was dying of thirst. Or a precious treasure that he was just plundering, and plundering, and plundering, until there was nothing left.
Oh no. I don’t want to let myself get turned on again. Not like this. Not when there’s so much tension between us. And not the good kind of tension, either. If I was a box of treasure before, now I’m a box of spiders. He can barely even look at me.
I can still feel him, though, all over my skin. My lips burn where his pressed against mine. My chin still tingles where his beard touched me. The small of my back can feel the spot where his palms pressed against my skin. My ass knows exactly where he grabbed me.
And as for that place between my legs… I’venever, everfelt anything quite like that before. The furthest I got with Chris was a little bit of crotch-rubbing, over our jeans, so you couldn’t feel a lot but denim — and my diaper, of course. And that didn’t really last long, because it felt like too much, too soon. I asked Chris to take things slower, and he agreed. I think, in retrospect, forbidding him from anything sexual made him want me more. Didn’t work both ways, though. The less we came near each other, the less I wanted to go near him at all.
With Finn, though, talk about acrazyfirst kiss. In our underwear, in a thunderstorm, with his enormous organ pressing between my legs.
And even though I’ve never seen one like that, in real life, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that he’smuchbigger than average.
I’m hardly a nun. I’ve seen pictures. I know what they’remeantto look like.
And I know what Finn Wilder looks like.
I can’t get that freakingtree branchout of my mind.
And even though I’ve changed into a dry diaper now, I’m still feeling wet.Drippingwet.
Stop this right now, Addison. You’re in a perilous situation. You’re on the way to see the sheriff. Something bad is happening. This is no time to get all tingly.
Even with the threat of the fire, and all the madness, Finn gave me time to change into a new diaper. That must count for something, right? He mustn’t totally hate me.
‘What’s that?’ says Finn, above the noise of the radio. ‘You muttering something to yourself?’
‘Oh,’ I blush. ‘Didn’t realize I was saying anything out loud.’
Finn turns the volume on the radio up a little, as a report of the fire comes on.
