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The hand still resting in his finally gave a slight squeeze back, his fingers leaving her chin as she slid her other hand back in his again.
“Yes, we do,” she said, the meaning there perfectly clear.
They were both trapped and there was no getting out.
Somehow it made him feel less exposed, more like they were on the same side, in it together. He wondered if she’d open herself up to him, once they were alone, and tell him exactly what terms her father had laid at her feet. Would he? Would he trust her? Could he?
This is a mistake…
But it was also a trap, and the sides of it had already closed around them before either of them had set foot in the circle surrounding them. There was no escape.
The words of witness were spoken by their respective mothers, their fathers secured the beautifully crafted gold bracelets around their wrists, signifying their eternal bond and their acceptance into their new extended families. The gathered guests sang the Song of Beginnings as Zeke took his mate by the hand, her eyes meeting his as their fingers grazed.
Chapter 4 - Anna
Anna’s heart was racing as she sat next to Zeke’s large and muscular frame, his scent in her nostrils, filling her heart with memories, digging up her buried hopes and dreams. It was making her feel sixteen again, her head spinning from the liquor she’d downed much too quickly once they took their seats at the table of honor. Two shots in two quick swigs, knowing she was raising a few eyebrows and not caring, especially when her eyes met the hard stare of Nikolai from across the room. He stood out like he was cut from granite in a sea of satin, his presence making her feel unsteady in the most uncomfortable of ways.
“Are you all right, dearest?” her mother—Samantha Aslanova—asked, seated to her right.
“Of course,” she lied, restraining the urge to reach for the vodka to refill her shot glass.
She was fine, except for the fact that she was a liar.
There was a reason her father had joined with Semyon, a deeper reason they hadn’t offered her and Zeke the traditional monthlong courtship that usually preceded the bonding ceremony, and that reason wasn’t their shared love of homegrown cherries; she was certain of that. There were dark times ahead. Her stomach clenched just thinking about how she might very well be on the cusp of aiding to bring in the darkness itself.
She lowered her gaze to the table, remembering the times she’d felt crushed under Nikolai’s appraising glares. It was baffling how she could so suddenly feel as though she’d walked away only yesterday. It was as if Nikolai’s quiet and constant nitpicking had gotten under her skin, and no matter how much she’d scrubbed to get clean of his influence, it was becoming clear to her that she’d failed miserably. It had only gone dormant, waiting for a moment such as this to spread its poison back through her bloodstream.
She was still as afraid of him as she’d ever been. His unpredictability made her fear what he might do if she crossed him, made her scared for her family more than anything else. It would be an even greater scandal if he were to spread a rumor that she’d promised herself to him only to end up bound to another dragon.
Her skin heated at the thought, her fingertips giving off a subtle glow, lit with her internal fire. It could have been taken for anger, but to her mind, it only underlined her shame.
She hung her head, keeping the tears at bay through sheer willpower. She didn’t want to embarrass her father by seeming ungrateful for the celebrations he’d secured her.
“Hey,” Zeke said next to her.
He’d noticed her fingers.
“Sorry,” she murmured. “I think it’s all just a bit much.”
He nodded, didn’t say anything else.
All she wanted was to get out of there. Leave the grand dining hall behind, with its green fabric wallpaper and elaborately painted ceiling, unscrew her smile, hide away by herself in some dark room.
She couldn’t do that, of course, because once the lamb had been devoured and the speeches and dancing were done, she wasn’t going back up to her bedroom, but to Zeke’s apartment. Because she was now his, and he was hers, and that meant they shared a home and a bed from this night onward. No matter that they hadn’t been afforded so much as one conversation in private for the past ten years, no matter that she was still a virgin.
She thought of him close, his skin under her fingertips, and they heated even further until she had to clench her hands together to stop herself from turning into the first glowing stage of transformation.
With her fists clenched she couldn’t wipe at the tears to keep them from trailing down her cheeks, and so, trail they did. Even as she’d told herself she could handle it. She had to.
When they stood face to face in the circle, she’d felt the same way she had all those years ago, and a part of her had been glad it was him and not some random son of some random dragon. Better him than anyone else she could think of in her parents’ circle. But once he took her hand, led her out of that circle, walked with her through the hallways she’d grown up in, there had been a blossoming hope in her chest that had been wholly unexpected. The hope that he trusted her, that he was choosing her. And with it came the terrible understanding of how she was doing nothing to deserve it.
Her emotions had been on a pendulum since they entered the dining hall, having their seats behind the honorary table. On the one hand, she felt like she couldn’t stand the thought of lying and would simply have to confess and face whatever consequences came with it. In the following breath, she was convinced it would end in death and destruction, and she pulled herself back into resolve. She would have to see the lie through, hide it from everyone, and pray she wasn’t found out.
***
Five hours later, the elevator doors of Zeke’s apartment building opened on a broad corridor, red paint on the walls, a red oriental carpet running the length of it. The doors of the apartments flanking it were all dark wood with gleaming numbers in gold on them. The place was so quiet, compared to the noise of her father’s house that they’d finally been allowed to get out of. Anna stepped gingerly out of the elevator to follow Zeke as he led the way to the front door of his home.
He hadn’t said much during the car ride over. Her father’s driver might have been the reason since there was no partition between the back and front seats. Was that it? Was it a sign that she’d been wrong to hope they were starting this joint journey on equal footing and in reality, Zeke was quietly distrusting her? She couldn’t deny the fact that it would make her feel better if he did. If he didn’t see her as the innocent offering that she’d been presented to him as, but rather as someone who might be bringing grief to him and those close to him. She’d rather he didn’t blindly believe her to be pure and good when that was the farthest from who she truly was.
