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She figured out what I was doing and tried to chase my mouth. I laughed with my head squeezed between her thighs.
I put a finger on her clit. A violent shiver went through her entire body. I slid it down to her entrance and pushed inside.
“Soaked,” I hissed and sucked on her clit hard. She yelped. I pushed a second finger inside her. A minute later she was panting and twisting. She was close.
“Oh, God,” she cried out, and her muscles clenched around my fingers. I somehow felt that clench on my dick.
She was steadying her breath, and I reached under the pillow and pulled out a condom. She watched me put it on in silence.
“Are we doing this?” I asked, leaning over her, watching her face for any sign of regret or hesitation. There wasn’t any.
She nodded frantically and wrapped her legs around my waist pulling me closer to her.
I angled myself and entered her in one go. We both groaned.
“I know you don’t want to hear it, but I’ll say it anyway,” I was moving slowly because I didn’t want to come in five seconds and I also wanted to see every emotion she would show me. “I love you, Clem. I know you’re scared of that, but I just can’t hide it anymore. Idon’t wanttohide it.”
She closed her eyes. A frown appeared between her brows. I kissed it and then invaded her mouth. I reached down between us and pressed her clit with my thumb. She arched her back with pleasure. My movements became faster and harder.
I felt my orgasm building up. She was also close. Her hands were squeezing my shoulders leaving dents in my flesh.
“Come for me, baby,” I groaned. Moments later she did, and I followed.
We spent the next couple of hours in her new bed almost in total silence. Only our moans were filling the air around us and the dirty things I whispered in her ear.
When we got dressed to head back to my house, she grabbed my wrist and stopped me as I was passing through the door. I looked at her face and worry changed the satisfaction I was feeling three seconds ago. She looked tormented.
“Are you okay?” I pulled her into my arms. For a moment I thought she wouldn’t let me hug her, but she did.
“I’m not a good person, Lucas,” she started crying. “You were right all along. I lie, I keep secrets. And that’s not even the worst thing I’ve done.”
“I’m not your mother, Clem,” I stroked her hair. “I don’t need you to be flawless. I just need you.”
We went back home and didn’t speak another word that night. I slept in her bed again. She broke into tears a couple of times, and I kissed her face dry every time, squeezing her into a tight hug.
Chapter Twenty
Clementine
The morning after Lucas and I had sex for the first time, I woke up feeling like shit. He was already gone. He always left my room and snuck back to his before everyone else woke up.
I didn’t regret we had sex. On the contrary. I thought it was the natural end point of things.Endbeing the important word here.
For the few days we spent together after New Year’s I found out that my heart swelled a little every time I saw him beaming at me. Because of me. I felt untroubled around him.
But I also knew it would end. He was bound to this town in so many ways, and I was going to leave it for good.
I sat up in my bed, and I touched my pendant.
The fact that he loved me didn’t surprise me. I knew it the moment I found his present in my luggage in Seattle.
I saw how he scanned my neck for the chain every time we saw each other for the first time in the morning. The relief and pleasure smoothing his face when he realized I wore it again.
I wished I could tell him that I loved him. But I had no right.
I was about to blow everything up once again. I knew it was for the best. We weren’t right for each other. He was way too… too everything to be with me. Too popular. Too desired. Too good.
I was vindictive, full of hate and unresolved issues. I was a total mess. I didn’t deserve him.
