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Evie smiled. “That’s what he always said he wanted me to be. Fierce. He took care of me, yes, but he never sheltered me. He wanted me to be strong, independent. I still can’t believe he’s gone, you know.”
The sadness in her voice gripped his heart in a cold vice.
“Sometimes I wake up and think, I’m going to go down to breakfast, and he’ll be sitting there, reading his morning paper, waiting for me to go riding with him.” She shook her head and smiled at him. “I am getting maudlin. You don’t need to hear this.”
“I think it’s wonderful,” he said absently.
Evie raised a brow at him. “What is?”
“Your relationship with your grandfather.”
Evie nodded mutely.
“Sometimes I wish….” He shook his head. “Now I am getting maudlin.”
“No, please. What were you going to say?” She tilted her head in interest.
“Sometimes, I wish I had a family like that,” he said with a shrug. “It’s an empty fantasy, hardly worth entertaining. How many families like yours do you really know? They are like unicorns. Or God.”
Evie laughed hard at that. “Don’t be blasphemous. I know you are a heathen, but you are talking to a believer.” She smiled at him coyly.
“Why?” He looked curiously at her. “How can you still be a believer after everything that happened to you?”
“That’s not fair. You cannot be a believer when times are good and stop believing when they are hard. It doesn’t work that way.”
“How does it work then?”
Evie tilted her head in thought. “I suppose having faith means trusting that everything you’re going through is for a reason. Trusting that it makes you stronger, cleverer, and brings you closer to your destiny.” He looked sardonically at her. “I know. You probably don’t believe in destiny, either. But that’s what I choose to believe. When times are hard, I have to believe that there will be benefits in the end, that I am just where I am supposed to be at this moment, that I haven’t strayed from my path. God deals us the cards, and I believe it’s up to us to make the best of it.” She shrugged lightly. “It isn’t magic. You cannot expect God to intervene when something bad happens. You have to trust that God gave you the instruments to deal with this hardship and that if you move past it, there will be rewards in the end.”
“That’s… very philosophical,” he said with a smile, and she laughed again.
“Similarly, you can’t just expect a caring family to happen upon you. I think if you want a caring family, you just need to create one yourself.”
He looked at her, startled. Was she saying what he thought she was saying?
“Look!” She pointed at the forest up ahead. “I think I see a river flowing there.”
“And?” He frowned in question.
“And, we can clean ourselves there.”
“In a cold river. At night.”
“Exactly. Listen,” she said seriously after a pause. “I have a shilling sewn into my pocket, but even if it does get us a room, no inn is going to let us in. And I am not sleeping as dirty as I am now. Do you have a better idea?”
Unfortunately, he didn’t. His only plan was to go to Vane Manor. But if they got there looking like beggars from St. Giles, they might not even be admitted. There was no guarantee the marquess was even in residence, and his staff would definitely turn them away. The marquess was a recluse and rarely left his estate, but it’d be just their luck not to encounter him inside.
With a sigh, Gabriel turned his horse toward the river.
“You don’t look even a little bit excited about the swim in the river,” Evie observed.
“You won’t be either when you feel how cold the water is.”
Evie scoffed. “Somehow, I am more afraid of having mud stuck in my hair. A little cold water I can handle.”
Gabriel raised his brow at her. “Have I ever told you that you are the most surprising woman I have ever met?”
“No, you haven’t told me that.” Evie didn’t look at him. She just smiled and cantered on.
