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“But if you ever run into trouble, or if you have any questions, know that you can always come to me. I shall gladly impart any knowledge I possess.”
“I would love that. I have been going over matters for a few weeks now, and I am questioning my every decision.”
Winchester laughed. “It’s a good sign!”
“Is it?”
“Yes, you should never be overly confident in your decisions. People’s lives depend on those choices. If you are questioning yourself, it means you care. It also means that you might come up with better alternatives. Why don’t you come to my study tomorrow after breakfast? We can go over any questions you have, and we shall see if I can help you.”
“I would be eternally grateful.”
“No need for that,” Winchester dismissed with a wave of his hand.
Evie’s heart swelled with gratitude. But she remembered the rift between the earl and her husband and hesitated. “Gabriel might not be too fond of the idea of us working together.”
Winchester huffed a laugh. “I hoped you’d persuade him to join us. He seems to hold you in high esteem. I shall be honest, we don’t have the best relationship, and it’s my fault, really. But I dared to hope you might help us mend the rift.”
“I shan’t ask him to do what he doesn’t want,” she said.
“You are protective of him. That is good. I hoped he’d find a lady of your fine character, someone who cared for him, perhaps even loved him.” Winchester studied her curiously.
Evie cleared her throat. “You said the poor relationship between you and your son was your fault. How is that?”
Winchester heaved a sigh. She expected him to get irritated at her nosiness, but he spoke eagerly. “My wife, his mother, was a flighty lady, like a wind. Nothing about her was constant. I loved her more than I’ve ever loved a soul,” he continued, his eyes taking on a dreamy look. He shook his head as if clearing away the memories. “I thought she would change after we married. That she’d be a devoted wife and mother.” He grimaced.
“She did not?” Evie asked, immersed in the earl’s recollections.
“No, she did not. She continued having her liaisons all throughout our marriage. And I forgave her every time.”
Evie’s eyes grew even wider. She wondered why he was confiding in her so openly. And then she thought of Gabriel. Would he do the same? The thought brought a sharp pain to the region of her heart.
“I begged her to be discrete,” the earl continued. “But discretion was not in her nature. She got with child while I was away on a trip. Everyone knew the child was not mine.” He shook his head in shame.
“Do you mean Gabriel?” Her mouth fell open.
“No.” The earl laughed. “No, Gabriel is mine. However, I had my doubts at the beginning as well. Her second child was not, however. She died in childbirth.”
Evie gasped, and the earl turned to her. “There were many rumors after that. Some said I killed her for infidelity; some even condoned the idea. Most people questioned Gabriel’s parentage, as did I for a while. I was grieving, alone, confused, and left to care for a small child by myself. A child I didn’t know how to raise. I was afraid he’d turn out just like his mother, but I saw more and more of me in him every day. And that’s where it all went wrong.”
“How so?”
“You see, Gabriel is the spitting image of his mother. I was afraid he’d grow up to be exactly like her.”
Evie cocked her head to the side.He is like her, isn’t he?
“So when I saw a feature, some speck of resemblance he had to me, I tried to reinforce it. I tried to discipline him as hard as I could, forcing so much responsibility on him, so much pressure on the little child that he naturally rebelled. I was young and proud and couldn’t have a son who was as flighty, disloyal, and irresponsible as my wife. What I did not realize, however, was that Gabriel resembles his mother only outwardly. His character, his spirit, his mind—all mine. Perhaps not the best endorsement either.”
Evie laughed. “He has your eyes.”
Winchester nodded. “That he does. And my heart. He is devoted, loyal to a fault. His last downfall is the result of that, I think,” he said with a shake of his head.
“He did it for me,” she said softly, then added with a short laugh. “In a way.”
The earl looked at her quizzically but said nothing. At that moment, Gabriel appeared at her elbow with two glasses of wine. “Here you are, wife,” he said with a grin as he extended the glass.
“Thank you, husband.” She smiled right back at him. From the periphery of her vision, she saw Winchester’s satisfied smirk.
* * *
