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Chapter 21
Evie undressed with the help of her maid, performed her nightly ablutions, and sat by the hearth, brushing out her hair.
“One hundred strokes,” she murmured under her breath, humming as she brushed until she heard the adjoining door to her husband’s chambers open and close. She turned and beheld Gabriel, standing by the door, one shoulder propped against the doorjamb. He had disposed of his coat, waistcoat, and cravat; his shirt was open at the collar, sleeves rolled up on his forearms.
He looked deliciously enticing. She wanted him. She wanted to give herself to him. But she promised herself not to be seduced by the devilish viscount, no matter how tempting. At least, not until her heart could afford it.
She stood and placed the brush on her vanity table. As she turned, she immediately collided with his chest. “Ow!” She staggered back a step, and he caught her by her arms.
“Steady,” he said, smiling. “No need to be knocked off your feet by my beauty.”
Evie couldn’t help but smile back. At that moment, Gabriel tugged on her arms, crushed her to his chest, and lowered his mouth to hers. His kiss was hard, demanding, desperate. He had never kissed her like that before. She couldn’t help but sag against him and open her mouth to him. He swept his tongue inside with a groan while his hands roamed her body. Evie was ready to give up on her resolve and let him bed her right then and there.We are married, her treacherous mind whispered to her.It will be so good; you won’t regret it. But she knew she would.
Evie pulled away from him with a whimper. “No,” she said, panting.
“No?” Gabriel’s expression was so full of surprise that she wanted to laugh. He’d probably never heard the word in his life. Not from women, in any case.
Evie took a deep breath before repeating more firmly, “No.”
“Why not?”
She swallowed and took a couple more steps away from him. His scent, his warmth, even the sight of him was too distracting. She turned and walked further away from him. Evie propped her back against the cool wall by the window and finally looked up at him.
“Gabriel, when we made the bargain, you promised we wouldn’t be doing this.”
“Forget the blasted bargain. Too many things have passed; you can’t possibly be still holding on to that?”
“I am.”
“Why?”
Evie let out a bitter laughter.
“You know that I love your laughter?” Gabriel asked gently as he made several steps toward her. He stopped a few inches away. His heat, his closeness muddled her mind. He raised his hand and cupped her cheek, running his thumb over her skin in a gentle caress. “But not that laughter.” He lowered his head again, but when his lips were an inch away from hers, Evie ducked and danced out of his reach.
“Gabriel, you’re not listening to me.”
He threw his hands up. “Fine! Tell me. What’s so wrong about a husband wanting to kiss his wife?”
“What’s wrong is that you don’t want just a kiss. And neither do I.”
“Well, that problem is easily fixed.” He started unbuttoning his shirt.
Evie licked her dry lips, her eyes frantically running over every inch of his newly revealed naked skin. “There is a reason why I can’t—no, I shan’t spend the night with you.” She paused, steeling herself to finally tell him the truth. “I love you.”
There, she’d said it. The world didn’t tilt on its axis; the sky didn’t collapse on her, and she didn’t die or turn into stone.
Gabriel’s fingers stilled mid-motion.
She laughed. “I love you, Gabriel. I have loved you for as long as I can remember. Always have. And I know that if I ever spend a night in your arms, if I ever… have marital relations with you, I shall not be able to let you go.”
Gabriel stood frozen in the middle of the room, his face ashen, his eyes large, his lips parted. He cleared his throat. “W-why didn’t you tell me?”
“Does it matter? Would it have changed anything if I had told you earlier?”
Gabriel uncomfortably shifted from one foot to another. Clearly speechless. A very rare occurrence with her lithe-tongued husband.
“If what you’re saying is true,” he finally said, “then I don’t see what the issue is here. You want me; I want you. Besides, we are already married.”
