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But he’d quickly shut himself off from her. Because as he gazed into her soul, he felt it, too.
She was falling in love with him.
And he’d immediately detached himself from her.
Because he didn’t love her back.
Because he couldn’t.
* * *
Jo rushed into her room after Richard had escorted her from the roof. She closed the door and leaned her back against it. She looked at her hands, only to notice that they were shaking.
What in the world was going on?
The last time something like this had happened was when she had to make her debut as a lead in a play and she shook like a leaf, feeling cold and feverish at the same time before the theater manager pushed her onto the stage and she was forced to perform in front of thousands of people.
Anxious.
Afraid.
“Are you unwell?” Selena’s voice startled her out of her skin.
Jo jumped and looked at the bed, where her friend raised her head from the pillow to peer at her.
“Yes, I…” Her voice was breathless. Jo pushed herself off the door and stumbled toward the bed on legs that felt like wool. “Selena, I’m in trouble.”
Selena shot up to a seating position, her brows furrowed. “What’s the matter?”
Jo grimaced. “I think… I think I fell in love with the viscount.”
Selena raised her brow, then pursed her lips. She scooted toward Jo and took her cold, shaking hands into her steady and warm ones. “And why is that trouble?”
Jo raised her eyes to hers. “You know why. You know what happened the last timethathappened.”
Selena smiled and squeezed Jo’s hands. “You were young then. You are an experienced woman now. You know how to protect yourself. Why hide from love? It is one of the joys of life. Without it, who are we?”
Jo let out a chuckle. “You are quite the romantic, Selena.” And after her sordid affair with Mick, that was surprising indeed.
“We have an advantage over these aristocratic young ladies. They have to choose a person to marry and settle for that person for the rest of their lives. We get to fall in love with as many people as we want. And we can happily embrace affairs with them. So take advantage of this freedom.”
A sigh left Jo’s lips on a shuddering breath. She didn’t agree with Selena. Jo wasn’t one to fall in and out of love easily. And that was the reason for her doubt and confusion. “It can’t be love, can it? People don’t fall in love this fast. I have known Richard for less than two weeks!”
“Yes, and some people don’t fall in love for their entire lives. I have been looking for love and failing for years. You… you just stumbled upon it. Embrace it.”
Jo looked down. Her breathing was becoming more even. “You know that I can’t.”
“Says who?” Selena scoffed. “Listen, darling. People like us… we don’t get happy marriages. I mean, who are you going to marry? Mick?”
“Ugh!” Jo grimaced and couldn’t help the sound of disgust.
Selena cackled a laugh. “But who needs a marriage when we can have happy affairs? The man adores you. It is quite obvious. And yes, it mightn’t last long, but it doesn’t need to. At least you would’ve been happy. And in a few years, looking back on your happy days, would you regret them?”
Jo frowned. She regretted the last man she loved… She regretted a lot of things in the past. But with Richard, it felt different somehow.
Yes, he was arrogant and conceited. He was domineering and exasperating. And yet she was drawn to him. She wanted to spend every minute of every day in his arms. And if that’s the feeling she remembered, surely she wouldn’t regret it?
Selena squeezed her fingers. “Be careful with your body, darling. But do not rein in your heart. You could be turning away from great happiness.”
