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“Is he not?”
Annalise halted and rounded on her friend.
Lavinia grimaced. “I just mean… It’s been a long time. Perhaps he has changed.”
“That’s the most frustrating part!” Annalise cried. “I do not know. And he doesn’t say where he’s been or what he’s been through. He seems different, feels different. You know how he was, always drunk, always away. Now he just looks… haunted.”
“Haunted?”
Annalise nodded and returned to her seat. “He absolutely refuses to talk about the past… Which, of course, means he hasn’t asked about mine either. He doesn’t even mention Kensington anymore, apart from the one time when he’d just woken up.”
Lavinia grimaced and placed her hand on Annalise’s. “Does that mean you haven’t told him?” she asked softly.
Annalise’s smile turned bitter. “No, dear. I don’t think I can. I don’t think it would make a difference either.”
Lavinia licked her lips. “Perhaps, you can use this two-month reconciliation to your advantage. I know you still want children. I also know you need Blake’s help with that. I cannot imagine how you feel being around him again, but if he’s insisting on spending time together, perhaps you can gain something from it, too. If you leave two months later, it could be with a babe in your belly.”
At that moment, the maids came in with the trays of food, and Lavinia’s eyes lit up.
Her friend’s distraction let her wallow in her own thoughts for a bit. It’s not like she hadn’t thought about a babe. She wanted to have one badly. But being alone, isolated in Sussex, with a growing belly… She didn’t know how she felt about that. The thought just gave her a headache.
When the trays were settled between them and they armed themselves with brioches and a cup of tea, Lavinia spoke again. “There’s actually something else I wanted to talk to you about.”
“Oh?” Annalise raised a brow behind her teacup as she sipped her tea.
“Since you are not marrying Dane anymore….”
Annalise put her cup down with a clink. “No,” she said in disbelief.
Lavinia looked away. “I just mean… He is free, right?”
“Lavinia!” Annalise’s mouth fell open a notch. “Didn’t you tell me that you were done with the girlish infatuation? That you were never truly in love with him? I would never have accepted his proposal if it weren’t so!”
“And that is exactly why I told you all that.”
Annalise’s eyes watered, and her throat started to smart. “Lavinia, dear. Please, tell me you didn’t talk the man you’re in love with into marrying me!”
“I didn’t talk him into anything, I just mentioned your predicament, and he was the one who came to the rightful decision.”
Annalise stared at Lavinia, frozen with her eyes wide and her mouth half-open.
When Blake had disappeared, Annalise was left alone, destitute, desperate, and… in a delicate condition. She’d just found that out a day after Blake’s disappearance, and a few days later, she told Lavinia about her woes. The next day marked the first time Kensington had proposed to her.
It wasn’t exactly a proposal. He said he would be willing to look after her and the babe, whatever may come. And if Blake didn’t return, he would be willing to take her as a wife. Annalise had been rendered mute. The last thing she could think about at that time was being married again. Her first marriage had barely begun and had caused her nothing but pain. But she also held out hope that Blake would be back and that the babe would bring them closer together.
Annalise swallowed. What had happened next was too horrible to think about. She’d lost those dreams on the day Blake’s signet ring arrived with the missive denoting his death.
“Dear.” Lavinia’s voice brought Annalise back from her dark memories. “At the time, you needed a friend, a strong and powerful friend.”
Lavinia was right. In a day, she became a widow without a stipend, as Blake had not arranged for one. Her parents would not take her back, she knew. She would have died on the streets, alone. And in the state of mind she was in, she wouldn’t even have minded that.
But everything had turned out differently. Blake’s heir, Townsend, had sheltered her and made certain she would want for nothing. Kensington had shielded her with his protection. And apparently, her best friend had given up the man she’d loved her entire life for her.
“You shouldn’t have done that,” Annalise said with a frown.
“Well, I knew he wouldn’t marry me, anyway. It was a useless dream to hold on to. Besides, I love you both. And I would rather see you two together.”
Annalise didn’t know what to say. At that time, she had been too wrapped up with her own problems to recognize what Lavinia was doing. Now it all made a lot more sense.
