AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“So, how was your day?”
Okay, so apparently, we were going to do small talk first. Swallowing a bite of my sandwich, I wiped my mouth before speaking. “It was okay. I practiced some and feel like I’m making progress. But then I hit a cat, and,” I stopped, my lip trembling as I recalled everything.
“Oh my God, Lenn. Are you okay?”
Reaching across, I grabbed his hand, needing his comfort. “I love that you ask how I am first instead of the cat.” I laughed as I wiped my eyes. “Yeah, I’m okay. I guess I hadn’t realized the intensity of everything I’ve been feeling since last week. Ugh, so yeah, I hit a cat, and while I was checking on it, a person stopped. And um, I didn’t tell you something.”
I didn’t know why I was bringing this up now, but it was like my mouth wouldn’t stop. Lifting my eyes, I took in Simon and wondered how this would affect things. Was I sabotaging? Was I doing this now so he couldn’t tell me?
“You know what, it doesn’t matter. I’m okay, the cat was okay, and Sunny is okay.” Blowing out a breath, I smiled a bit watery but forced it anyway. “I’m glad we’re doing this, though. I’ve missed you and wanted to spend time with you.”
“Me too, Lenn. Me too.”
“So, what did you want to tell me?”
“Oh, um, it’s nothing. Don’t mind me.”
“Oh, well, it just seemed kind of important.”
He wouldn’t look at me, shaking his head as he ate. Picking apart my sandwich, I stared at it, hoping it would give me the answer I sought.
“Are you not hungry?”
“No, not really. I might just go to bed.”
Standing, I picked up my plate and took it into the kitchen. Standing at the sink, I tried to stop the tears, but everything inside of me had crumbled. The day had been a lot; from my rage, then fear, all of it bringing back memories. So, I stood at the sink and cried, hoping to get it out of my system. I’d thought my tears were silent, but a few seconds later, Simon turned me into his arms, and I completely fell apart sobbing.
I wanted to be strong and not need Simon or his comforting embrace, but he felt so warm and safe, so I gripped onto his shirt tighter and buried my head into his chest. I felt Simon’s hand rub the back of my head, soothing sounds leaving his mouth. When I started to hiccup, he pulled me back, wiping the tears with his thumbs.
“What’s going on, Lenn?”
Shaking my head, I let my hair fall forward, covering my face. I couldn’t take it. I couldn’t be rejected again. Not with how I was feeling, all the emotions on the surface.
“Do you want to play a game or something?”
“No, I do want to go to bed. I’m exhausted. Thank you for being my Kleenex.”
“Anytime, pretty girl. I’m always here for you.”
Nodding, I tried not to dismiss his statement. He might think that, but he wasn’t. Or maybe, it was more he couldn’t be. Not the way I wanted him to be right now anyway.
Shutting my door, I climbed onto my bed and curled up with my pillows and stuffed animals. I didn’t care that I was twenty-five. I slept with them every night. You only have to feel bad about things if you let yourself. I’d decided a long time ago not to.
An hour later, I’d calmed down, and had soft music playing as I tried to sleep now. I’d changed into some sleep shorts and a tank top, and I laid in bed, my star galaxy light shining on the ceiling.
Unfortunately, it didn’t seem to matter how tired I was, I couldn’t shut my brain off. So, I laid there staring at the stars hoping they’d bring me comfort like they had so many times before. It was hard when so many of my heartbreaks were also wrapped up in them. The sad song in the background played on, an accurate description of how I felt. Music usually brought me comfort, but today, it just reminded me of all the things I didn’t have.
A soft knock sounded on my door, and I waited to see if Simon would let himself in or not. When nothing happened, I got up and walked to the door, my bare feet padding on the hardwood. When I opened it, I was surprised to find no one there, only a note. Picking it up, I opened it to find a card.
Lenn,
I’m an idiot, but mostly a coward. Since I can never find the words to say to your face, maybe I can show you. Follow the pieces.
Simon
A few feet in front of me was a white square. Picking it up, I realized it was like a comic book square. Inside it was a drawing of a boy and girl lying on a bed, reading.
“You’re my best friend.”
