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I brushed my lips against hers as Finn squeezed my shoulder and came up behind the two of us. I knew it had to be him, as one of the girls would have squealed and let us know their presence halfway up the beach.
“Are you both okay?” Finn asked sheepishly, realizing he’d interrupted a delicate time. “I’ve set up my tent if you need some privacy.” He shrugged his shoulders. “It’s there if you need it, okay? I’m just going to check on the girls, but we’ll be over by the rocks.”
“Thanks Finn. That means a lot. We’ll be fine.” I held onto Summer tighter as she just let out a meek smile and nod at Finn. “We’ll come and find you soon.”
I felt the exhale of breath on my skin as Summer saw Finn head off into the distance. She wasn’t blind and must have seen he knew about the pair of us, but I think whatever had gotten her so worked up and emotional was something she didn’t want to share with an audience. It wasn’t like she didn’t trust the guy; she barely knew him to be truthful. I fell into the same court though, being a nobody in terms of knowing how the woman ticked, but I knew that whatever it was, it was for my ears alone.
“I panicked…” she muttered against my skin, running her hands down my back as my mind cast back to last night. I’d checked in the mirror last night and sure as hell, she’d left her mark. A few prominent nail scratches and the odd cut. Fuck, it was hot, as I quickly shook my head.Panicked, she’d been fine when I left her.“I had a full-blown panic attack and I let the overwhelming sensations take hold rather than fight them. I didn’t have your number or any of the others to contact you.”
The hot, wet tears hit my skin, and I choked back my own need of anger to expel. Why hadn’t I given her my number? I shot a glance at the trio and thought the same about them. We’d all been too caught up in life to even think of basic communication. We just normally crawled out of bed and walked to one another’s houses. It wasn’t like we were spread across the island or anything.
“Shall we go to Finn’s tent?” I asked, wondering if the privacy would be better than in the middle of an opening where any passers-by coming and going could see Summer’s emotions. “Or we could go closer up the beach, maybe nearer the guys, take a seat in the sand up at the loose pebbled edge over there.” I pointed to the secluded side, an area where people tended to avoid because of the slippery surface at times, but Summer wouldn’t need to know that, as we wouldn’t venture just that far. I’d take a stand and sit us down a few meters before, so I still had a good view of any potential hazards.
I couldn’t help being overprotective. Whether I was on duty or not, I couldn’t not be precarious of my surroundings and the people around me. Dad always said it was because of the way I was trained. I know differently though, so did Finn. That day all those years ago still haunted me, and this was my way of dealing with it. If I could prepare and know the facts, I was fine. That was probably why I knew that Summer’s fear was irrational. The statistics helped guide the point across and made me believe the words I spoke to her. All she needed was reassurance. That’s all I needed.
“Wherever you want. I trust you.” She steadied her tone as easily as she could.
“Come on.”
I grabbed her hand and went closer to the rocks, even though I knew it would be nearer the water. My gut screamed that whatever had panicked her stemmed from this source and I couldn’t have her retreating after she’d made such amazing progress with me. I made sure I picked a secluded spot and pulled her onto me, so she straddled my lap, hoping the instant contact soothed her rather than scared her. The moment I felt her muscles sag against me, I knew I was right; she needed the comfort. She just needed me.
“We can just sit, revel in each other’s company. We can kiss,” I admitted, placing my hand against her heartbeat. “We can even just listen to the sea behind us, but whatever upset you, I’m here now.” I brushed my lips down her jawline before I lifted her chin with my forefinger to gaze into her eyes. “We face it together. We face our fears, our pain, and the panic that causes them. Otherwise…” I gulped.
“We drown from the grasps it holds over us,” Summer finished, looking out to the sea as she stood up and held my hand. “I trust you, Hudson. I need to do this.”
“I know… but believe me, it’s still baby steps,” I replied as she nodded next to me. I guided her forward slowly, watching the fear start to show across her body, as her torso stiffened, and she pulled her arms to cover her body. She tightened all her muscles and her teeth visibly ground next to me like every step was like a hot poker searing through her skin like melted butter, slicing her apart. Her widened eyes pleaded with me to make the sensations within her cease.
I couldn’t bear the anguished pain I saw, so I spun her body towards the ocean and gathered her close to my chest, uttering the words I hoped she clung to as I took a risk with her heart and trust in me.
“Summer, place your hand on my heart, feel the steady pace that it travels at.” I moved my fingers over hers and tapped the repetitive beat without fault, keeping my gaze steady on hers. “Feel the sensations under your feet but don’t let it overwhelm you when it changes.” I nodded, watching her gulp hard as I circled my other arm around her waist. “The only thing you have to do is lose yourself in this.”
I felt her shudder as my mouth closed over hers as I took her step-by-step backwards, rubbing circles with the pads of my fingers across her sensitive flesh. The exhale of her breath as her tongue clashed and fought for domination against mine made my movements faster, but I ensured that each step I took was slow and steady. I didn’t want her to freak out by the stark change in need that consumed my body or the fact that I’d be taking her onto a couple of rocks before the descent into the shallow water.
“Mmm Hudson,” she moaned against my lips, making me smile as I trailed my fingers down the crease of her spine and teased the helm of her bikini.
I continued my mission forward as I tried to keep the calmness intact that I’d learned from my lifeguard training within me. One step at a time. I knew the second we’d hit the rocks when I felt the stiffness of her body and the stillness of her lips, but I didn’t stop with my hands, just pulling my lips back marginally.
“Summer, you’re doing great. Feel the beat, feel the sparks, feel what you are doing tome!”I couldn’t miss the gasped tone escaping her lips as I let out a growl. “I know, baby. We can’t now, but later… you can. Least we can lose ourselves with our tongues.”
I felt the relaxation of Summer’s shoulders as her mouth took mine again, taking exactly what she needed to feel the security she craved as I took the few steps until her feet touched water. I saw the emotional rollercoaster she fought in the depths of her mind as the tears cascaded, but instead of pushing me away, her hands moved to my face, and she drove her tongue into my mouth as if life depended on it. I kept walking back until I managed to get our waists deep in the water and pulled back from her mouth.
“Ko’u aloha,” I replied.
“My love,” she admitted with a smile.
“How did you know?” I asked, stunned as I gazed up to the sky.
“I didn’t know, but you just told me.” She smiled back as the calmness in my heart couldn’t be stilled any longer. “You just revealed a little more of the inner you.”
CHAPTERNINE
SUMMER
What was Hudson doing? Finn, Amelia, and Jess were nearby. The beach wasn’t secluded. I mean, other people could see this public display of affection and all I wanted was Hudson to ease the burning pulse that was between my thighs. Fuck, I wanted him to get down right and dirty here, but I couldn’t stop his mouth from assaulting mine. Nope, I mean mine assaulting his. I mean, my mind was that lost in the whirlwind of his essence, I couldn’t even think straight let alone process what was happening until the feel under my footing changed.
I had a decision to make and if I flitted after Mom’s revelation, after the way I’d been unable to speak my hurt to Hudson yet, then I’d fall deep within the crushing crevice of my soul and never get out again. This pain was too deep and painful to escape from again and I’d come too far to let it swallow me up. I wasn’t about to wilt and fall; I was about to stand tall. Fight through what I knew was against me and take control with Hudson leading the way.
I never thought I’d be in the water. I never imagined that I’d love the coolness as it soothed the heated rays that bounded from the sun in the sky. I was lost in the scene and the pure gift that Hudson had given me, freedom. I never thought it was a possibility for me to achieve. I mean, a toe dip or a kick in the water edge felt a million miles away only last week and now I was waist high, wanting to wrap my legs around Hudson and be closer, even though I didn’t know how that was possible. He’d already broken into every crevice I had around me and finally found the real me. I mean, my fear was long from gone, but I had hope that it could be eased over time.
