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“Nice, Jasmine!” he calls out.
She smiles at him in return. Smiles. Pax’s decision to pivot his attention from me to Jasmine has worked better than I ever could have imagined.
I miss him like crazy, though. This fully clothed shoulder-to-thigh hour every week is all we have right now, other than our late-night texting sessions. I’m drinking more coffee to make it through my workdays, but it’s so worth it. We talk about our days and what we want for our future, and we also send photos and sexy messages to get us through. I have a photo of Pax in bed, shirtless and smirking, that is the top item in my spank bank.
Yes, I have a spank bank. It makes me laugh sometimes, but there’s nothing funny about getting myself off while looking at my absolute specimen of a man in bed. Especially when I know how great the sex will be when we can have it again.
Jasmine runs over after practice to ask if I saw what she knows I saw, as is her habit.
“Did you guys see my cartwheel? On beam? Coach Julie said it was the best one I’ve ever done?”
You guys. She said you guys. I could cry with happiness.
“I got it on video,” Pax says. “Do you want me to send it to your Uncle Pike?”
Jasmine lights up. “Yes! Tell him my coach said it was the best I ever did.”
“You got it.”
Pax types out a message and Jasmine starts packing her bag. This has become our Monday night routine. I could hardly wait for this today at work. Spending time with my two favorite people didn’t seem possible a month ago, but we’ve come a long way since then.
“Hey, I’d love it if you guys could come to our home game Friday night,” Pax says while we all walk to my car. “You can sit in our family box and they have a great buffet before the game. Indie and Nolan will be there, I think.”
“What do you think, Jas?” I ask.
“Sure.”
“Great,” Pax says. “I won’t be able to see you until after the game, and it’ll be late, but we can grab a bite to eat if you guys want to.”
Jasmine grins. “Will I get to stay up until midnight?”
I put an arm around her, laughing. “If you want to.”
Pax opens her car door and she tosses her gym bag into the car. And then, she does something completely unexpected.
“Pax, Mom said we can go out for ice cream. Do you want to come?”
He pauses for a beat, clearly taken aback, as am I.
“Yeah, I’d love to,” he says.
“Okay, you can sit in the front with Mom because she doesn’t let me sit there.”
Jasmine gets into the car and Pax and I exchange a smile. I want to throw my arms around his neck and kiss him, but…baby steps.
Pax folds his long limbs into the passenger seat of my Honda Accord and I laugh at his hunched position.
“That looks super comfortable,” I say.
“Like a clown car.” He winks at me and glances back at Jasmine. “Hey Jasmine, I heard your coach talking about a meet in California. Do you get to go to that one?”
“Only if I qualify and Mom can afford it.”
I cringe inwardly. She’s telling the truth, but I don’t want Pax offering to pay for it. It’s taken me long enough to convince Pike that I won’t accept unlimited money from him. He already does so much for us.
“Well, I love California,” Pax says. “And if you qualify, I think we’ll make it happen.”
“Really?” Jasmine meets my gaze in the rearview mirror. “Could I go, Mom?”
She works hard at gymnastics, and I don’t want to deny her this opportunity. I also don’t want to deny Pax the chance to be a hero to her, because happiness means more to me than my stubbornness.
“Yes,” I tell her. “If you qualify, we’ll make it happen.”
“Where is it in California?” Pax asks me.
“San Diego, I think.”
Pax grins. “Perfect. My parents have a place there.”
“Oh my gosh, I have to practice!” Jasmine says. “Mom, can I practice in the yard when we get home?”
“For a few minutes. If your homework is done.”
“Aww,” she grumbles. “I still have to read a chapter of my stupid library book.”
A smile plays on Pax’s lips. I wondered if it would be hard for him, getting to know a child so close to the age Jack would have been if he’d lived. Like always, though, he’s giving his all and staying optimistic.
“Have you ever been to the beach?” Jasmine asks Pax between licks of her chocolate chip ice cream cone with sprinkles.
“I love the beach. I like swimming, kayaking, and fishing. What about you?”
“I went to the beach once in Florida. There was green stuff in the water, though.”
She wrinkles her nose and I explain.
