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He smiled at the table. "I'm pretty sure that happened the moment I watched a god hover over you as protectively as a lover." Then he looked up, his eyes finding me beneath the rim of his lashes. "It's hard, though. When we came back after buying you new clothes? I couldn't decide if you were a beautiful woman, or if I should be appalled for even thinking such a thing. And the truth is it's both. I still want you to come to me with the things you can't ask anyone else, but you're not a child anymore. Which means that I need to give you the same respect I want you to give me."
Jamik paused, reaching up to rub at his eyes. Then, with a heavy sigh, he pushed his plate away, not even half the meal finished. With the space between us clear, he caught my hand again.
"The first time I ever saw you, Amerlee had you huddled against her like some protective mother hen. Your hair was matted, you were wearing this oversized shirt, and you were so pale and skinny that I thought you'd snap in half, but the only thing I could think was that she'd make such a perfect mother." He turned his head and sighed. "And I've always kinda thought of you that way, Nari. As my daughter, not my sister. Sadly, even daughters grow up, and fathers aren't perfect." He let out a heavy breath. "So how's that for putting it out there?"
I pushed my chair back and made my way around the table. Jamik watched me, sitting up as I got closer, which only made it easier to wrap my arms around him. I hugged as tightly as I could, and he pressed his face into my shoulder.
"You're the perfect father, Jamik," I breathed. "Or big brother, or even mentor. Amerlee loves you. Shalsa and Irila love you. I love you, Jamik. It's just a ring. Maybe that was the shield you hid behind, the excuse you used to convince yourself it's ok to care, but it has never been anything more than a small band of metal. It hasneverchanged you. It just stopped you."
"Yeah," he breathed, nodding against me. "I think Amerlee trained you too well. That sounds about like what she said." Then he chuckled. "And I should've asked about who hit you first, huh?"
"Grappling class," I told him, reaching over to pull his plate back in front of him. "Eat, and I'll tell you all about it."
He made a point of taking one more bite as I returned to my chair. "Did Talin break him?"
"I grabbed the guy by the ring before Talin could. Because, yeah, I thought my guardian was going to go over the rail after the guy."
Jamik finally let out a laugh that didn't sound forced. "He actually ended up being a pretty good guy too. Wraythe has some ointment that should make it heal faster. Smells like flowers, but it's made to help reduce the swelling and discoloration a little faster. What'd he do, slam his head into you?"
"Yep. Ghale's giving me a hard time because he thinks I shouldn't be in the class. I'm also behind the curve since I only had two years of weapons."
"You don't need weapons," he countered. "You need to know how to get someone off you so Talin and Wraythe can handle them. You need to know how to avoid a hidden blade - which would be short. You also need to learn how to disable a man stronger than you."
"Which means practice," I agreed. "But where? We don't have the student courtyard anymore, and the living room isn't going to cut it."
Jamik slowly began to smile. "There's always the Salle. It's where graduated guardians train. You know the stairs at the edge of the nave that lead to the basement? Well, the Salle is down there. We also have a full armory in case of attack, but for the most part, it's just used as a practice area. Has the same padded mats and sand pit as your classroom, along with a few more options."
"Willing to help me catch up?" I asked.
He nodded. "But you have to bring Eladehl. First, because I think he's more your speed as a sparring partner. Second, because I have a feeling that the lines between your guardian and his are blurry ones. And lastly, because you should not push him away because he's 'just' a Priest of the Body."
"That," I said, pointing at him, "is why you make a good dad."
His eyes jumped up in surprise, then what I'd said actually registered. And in all my life, I'd never seen that much pride in a man's eyes before.
Chapter 11
Nariana
After lunch, I had a few more classes, but when Orientation to Sexuality - which everyone called sexual orientation - was done, so was my first week of initiate schooling. As a group, the four of us headed to our suite, changed back into workout clothes, then grabbed a light meal in the dining hall. Jamik met us there, and when we were ready, led us downstairs to the Salle.
Unlike the classroom where I took grappling, the Salle was lit only with gas lamps. That made sense because it was in the basement, but the light flickered, casting shadows across the floor. It was also larger than my classroom. Here, the sand pit for sparring was sized for full-length weapons, not just hand-to-hand, and there was twice as much space covered in mats.
Jamik gave the four of us a tour around the area, explaining where we were and were not allowed. Basically, we could go anywhere, except in the armory itself. That also revealed that we weren't alone. An older man, probably in his early fifties, was working out against a padded bag, practicing punches. A group of men closer to Jamik's age were alternating turns with different weapons. Then there was a pair of guys who were probably barely out of initiate training talking in the corner.
By the time all of that was done, the last member of our group showed up. Irila bounced into the Salle with a smile on her face, but it faded as soon as she saw mine. A scowl took over as she stormed toward me.
"So this is why you said she needs lessons," Irila grumbled, catching my chin to examine the bruise by my right eye. "Nari, you have got to learn to duck better."
"Wasn't part of fencing, and that's pretty much all I know," I admitted.
She groaned. "Ok. Jamik? I got her. You give the boys a few lessons."
"Not boys," Talin corrected.
Irila just lifted a brow at him. "So long as I am your mentor, I get to call you a boy. Jamik gets called one too. Get used to it."
Talin just lifted both hands and backed up. "Yes, mistress."
