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She just tilted her head and refused to look away. "Talin." She made my name into a reprimand. A gentle one, but it worked.
"Today," I admitted, "for the first time, I thought about stepping down as her guardian."
"What?!" she gasped. "No. Why would you do that?"
"Because she's safer without me!" I stopped hard, struggling to get control of my tone. "Maela, Tath never would've known about her if it wasn't for me. I'm the one who left her alone. I knew he was going to try something, but I let her out of my sight. I got too comfortable, andthathappened. Last spring, she had her ribs broken because I wasn't fast enough. I keep failing her, and one day Wraythe and Ela won't be there to bail my ass out."
"That's why she also has Anver," Maela told me. "He's a very handsome man." She lifted a brow, a question hanging there, unspoken.
"He's not my lover," I said - and then stopped. "Ok, that might be a lie."
She laughed. "You aren't sure if he's your lover?"
"Not yet," I admitted. "It's complicated. Look, all I'm saying is that no matter what, I want you to stay friends with Nari."
"And Nari wants you as her guardian," Maela reminded me. "So, if you're worried about not being good enough, then be better, Talin. Learn. Push yourself - even when it's uncomfortable. It's what I had to do. It's what Yamina is doing right now, dancing with these men to make your mother stop worrying about Tath. We all have to make sacrifices. The question is what you're willing to give up."
"Not her," I admitted. "I'd rather step away and know she's safe than lose her."
"But you'd also rather stay with her," she said, hearing the part I hadn't said. "That's called love. It's worth fighting for."
"Like we did this morning?" I asked.
She blew out a heavy breath. "Yeah. Exactly like that, because when it comes to the things that matter, there should be no limits. Talin, I know my husband was wrong. Yamina knows her brother made a grave mistake. Thiemo thinks he deserves exactly what he got."
"And my mother?"
"She'll figure it out," Maela promised me. "But we're not your only family anymore. Nari is. Those guys are. Zeal is, Talin. If your brother is determined to make you choose, then just make sure you choose the right ones."
"Even if I'm the worst thing for her?" I asked.
Maela just leaned in and clasped my arm. "Do you honestly doubt Zeal that much? Do you think he would've given you to her if he didn't think you were worthy?"
"I'm not sure anymore," I admitted. "I just don't want to be the reason she gets hurt."
"Or maybe," Maela countered, "you'll figure out that what Nari is doing is dangerous. She will never be safe, because she's threatening the power these men have held for so long, and they aren't going to give it up easily. She willneverbe safe, so she needs to have someone willing to risk everything for her. You did that today. That's all I saw in there: three men who will stop at nothing to protect the woman they love. I will never hold that against you, because I would do the very same thing for Haryth. But if you want to cause problems with your family, then leave her. Yamina and I will never forgive you for that."
"I think you've spent too much time with our god," I teased. "You know just how to make sure the price is more than the temptation is worth." But I nodded, showing I'd heard what she said. "Thanks, Maela. I think that's exactly what I needed to hear. I'm still sorry it had to happen."
"Me too," she agreed, "but that's on Tath, not you. Not even them. Tath is the one who made the mistake. Nari warned him. Now, he's the one paying for it. Let him. Maybe he'll even learn something."
Chapter 5
Eladehl
Idanced with Nari's sister, stealing glances at Talin and Maela every chance I could get. I wasn't shocked when Kynsana caught me at it, but the girl said it was ok to look. She understood that something had happened and we were all trying to deal with it. Her quiet acceptance was nice, but it also made me overly aware of the fact that she and her siblings embodied Compassion just a little too well.
But everything seemed ok. When Maela handed her son to Talin, I breathed a sigh of relief. Kynsana seemed to relax as well. Surprisingly, she never bothered to ask what had all of us so distracted. So, when the song ended, I made a point of thanking her for that. She said it was her duty, and assured me she wasn't done yet.
To prove her point, she walked right up and asked Anver to dance with her. He was a little shocked, but since that meant I finally got my chance with Nari, I nodded at him in encouragement. I'd just pulled Nari into my arms when I caught something out of the corner of my eye. Turning, I found Wraythe guiding someone onto the dance floor as well. When the crowd parted, I realized it was Yamina.
"I think he likes her," Nari said as the next song started.
"Wrong kind of like," I assured her.
She just laughed. "I know, Ela. She reminds him of his own sister - or what he assumes his sister would've grown up to become. Yamina likes that Wraythe is big enough and intimidating enough to prevent other men from cutting in."
"And you should dance with him next," I told her. "He's been practicing, you know."
