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I didn’t realize I’d lowered my barriers. Mostly, I kept them up because I didn’t want to overwhelm her with my emotions. She already took on the grief of the world, that I couldn’t add to that. “I’m okay,” I said and tucked a finger under her chin, forcing a smile. “I promise.”
THIRTY
Niall
The grounds were quiet at midnight. The trees moved in the breeze as I strode around the edge of the castle, enjoying the wind whistling in my ears and crickets chirping in the distance. The pond emerged from the shadows, the lights from Azia’s windows glistening gold against the black water. Shards of ice floated as they slowly melted.
Slowly, I kneeled at its edge, gliding my fingers through the still water. Fireflies lit up from the tall grass, penetrating the darkness. We were the evilest beings to walk this world, inclined to the deepest caverns of sin we held as mortals. Yet, darkness didn’t exist in immortality. My eyes could pick up on every flicker of color, and even in the most palpable of nights, I could see the ugly in each thing, finally learning to appreciate all things. I gazed at the flutter of the bugs’ wings, undisturbed as they feasted on the dead bodies of other bugs. Spiders crawled over blades of grass, the hairs on their legs shining under the pale moonlight.
I could have stayed there forever, stuck in a memory of a mortal life I grew more distant from by the day. Ever since the night Kalon changed me, I vowed to never look back. But every now and then, I found myself coming here. The only place by the castle that reminded me of the home I grew up in.
It was a modest cottage, but my mother did her best to give my brothers and me a good life. At night, we’d sneak out to the pond out the back, much like this one. I would catch fireflies, giving them new homes in glass jars, then cry when they died. My mother put it down to my young age, but even then, I was captivated by collecting things.
Gwen was my firefly, luring me back to old habits. My father was different. His expectations were high, and when I didn’t live up to them, he would beat me worse than my brothers. I only went home once after I died—to return the favor.
I couldn’t even remember how any of their voices sounded as the memories of them dissolved over time. The world I grew up in had lived and died, and I remained young while everyone I used to love succumbed to old age. I wondered, from time to time, what happened to my brothers and mom.
Snapping myself from useless thoughts, I glanced back at the castle. I’d lost so many within those walls, old friends who became like family. Some had fallen prey to the rage of the aniccipere, who were segregated to the south. Others had been executed under Sargon’s laws, by killing another vampire, or treason. He was always paranoid, and if I didn’t have Kalon’s protection I would have fallen to the same grisly fate. Since then, I’d distanced my heart from any soul, feeling the sting of grief so much that it had become numb.
Azia’s door opened, and I lifted my gaze to meet his. “Who’s there?”
The instinct to hunt was strong tonight as the thought pricked my adrenaline. The blood of the sorcerer was an elation better than any drug. Not even my father could save me from Sargon’s wrath if I touched his precious sorcerer.
Grinding in my jaw, I raced away before my desire overcame my better reasoning. If I wanted to rule Sanmorte, I had to control my impulses. Once I was on the throne, I would restore the kingdom to its former glory. Wiping out the soul vampires would be first, rebuilding the south from ghost towns and rotting buildings into cities where vampires could thrive.
I’d integrate the modern world with ours, build armies of immortals that would tremble even Asland. No more living in the shadows, keeping the secret of how we can make other vampires from the world. No, mortals would come to us, wanting to feel our venom in their veins. Seraphina would be lured to the dark side; they always did submit once they tasted true power. With her at my side, we could build something unlike anyone had ever seen.
Sargon had us cower away, as if we weren’t the strongest. It made me sick. First, I had to kill Sebastian. His heart would be a trophy, a warning to all who would dare challenge me.
The feeling of being watched hung over me. I knew it well, but usually I was the one hiding in the darkness. Whipping my head around, I saw the soul vampire staring at me from behind some trees, its beady eyes focusing before it fled in a blur. I took off to chase it, when Gwen’s boyfriend came into my view.You.
I grinned, fangs glinting. If I couldn’t kill the sorcerer, I could at least destroy this leach. “What are you doing out here with an aniccipere?”
His eyes widened. “Oh, I didn’t know there was one.”
My eyebrows pulled down, wrinkling my nose. “I’m not as stupid as the others you might be able to convince. Why else would you be out here alone?”
“Maybe for the same reason you are.”
I half-laughed. If I took off his head right now, no one would be able to trace his death back to me.
I let out a hiss, moving faster than he could block. Sinking my fangs into his neck, I drank, even though vampire blood did nothing for me. He weakened quickly, and I wouldn’t stop until his head was detached from his shoulders. Then, biting my way through veins and bone, I slammed my hand over his mouth, muffling gurgled screams. Blood leaked down my chin, sliding between my fingers and over my arms.
“Stop!” Gwen’s voice sounded behind us.
Letting out a growl into his flesh, I pulled out. Then, with a smirk, I wiped the blood from my mouth.
“Astor,” she panted, running to his side as I dropped him onto the grass with a thud. His heart slowed as he lay unconscious. She glared up at me. “You bastard.”
“He’ll live.” I shrugged, and she ran at me. I wrapped my hand around the back of her neck, nestling her into my arms. “Don’t be a fool, sweetheart. We both know you can’t take me.”
Her knee slammed into my dick, a sharp pain, stealing my breath. I folded, holding my stomach as the nausea leaked up to my throat. “That,” she said breathlessly, “is just a warning.”
I paced closer, lifting her chin with a tight grasp, my gaze burning into hers. “The next time you do that, I will rip out his heart.”
She spat on my cheek. “Fuck you.”
I laughed, wiping the saliva with my hand. “Gladly,” I whispered, tugging her closer. “Admit it, you miss the thrill. You can’t really like being with him.”
